Expert Voices Archives - Mind Tools https://www.mindtools.com/blog/category/expert-voices/ Essential skills for an excellent career Mon, 27 Nov 2023 16:35:19 +0000 en-GB hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.5.3 https://www.mindtools.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/cropped-mindtools-favicon-32x32.png Expert Voices Archives - Mind Tools https://www.mindtools.com/blog/category/expert-voices/ 32 32 30 Years in the Making – Our New "Expert Voices" Podcast https://www.mindtools.com/blog/our-new-podcast/ Fri, 24 Feb 2023 12:00:00 +0000 https://www.mindtools.com/?p=36903 Mind Tools writer Jonathan Hancock has gone back to the microphone – and brushed up his broadcasting skills – to launch our new Expert Voices podcast.

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When I was twenty – three decades ago now, somehow – I sat behind a microphone every day of the week. I was a radio presenter with the BBC, taking my first steps in a broadcasting career that went on to last fifteen years.

I loved it: interviewing politicians and pop stars, covering huge news stories, and getting to do plenty of behind-the-scenes work, too. I started out on large reel-to-reel tape machines, doing razor-blade editing (yes, really: the original cut-and-paste!) and stayed long enough to experience the revolutionary transition to digital recording and mixing.

The point came when I was ready for new things. I left to try my hand at teaching, and I spent ten years in education – followed by another move, into publishing, which led me to my current role as a writer at Mind Tools.

And now, in a lovely bit of circling back to the beginning, I've taken my seat behind a microphone once again.

But a lot has changed in the past thirty years.

How Do You Make a Podcast?

Since joining Mind Tools in 2019, I've always worked on our Expert Interviews: half-hour conversations between presenter Rachel Salaman and hundreds of world-leading thinkers, writers and academics. So I've become very familiar with our vast library of interviews.

And, midway through last year, I had an idea: to produce a podcast showcasing these audio gems in a new, topical way.

It seemed like a great way to explore current workplace issues, by delving into the archives and discovering what our experts have to offer. The presenters could share their experiences and insights, too. And our audience would get to have their say.

I was delighted to be asked to co-present with Rachel (a seasoned presenter in her own right!). And, after a fair bit of discussion and testing, the Mind Tools Expert Voices Podcast was born.

The Mind Tools Expert Voices Podcast

Rachel already had her own recording space at home. But, since I was no longer equipped with a BBC studio, I had to set up my own. So I bought myself a good podcasting microphone, worked out how to connect it to my editing software, and enjoyed playing around with all the settings.

We'd agreed on the topic for Episode 1 – how to get a pay raise or a promotion, even when times are tight – so next I set about scouring the Expert Interviews, hunting for relevant ideas and advice – from the perspective of an employee. Meanwhile Rachel collected her clips, with managers and leaders in mind.

When recording day came, I propped up some pillows around me and my equipment (using a YouTube tip about stopping sound waves from bouncing around the room). Then I linked up with Rachel via Zoom, and we launched into Episode 1.

Remembering Old Skills – and Learning New Ones

To begin with, I felt more than a little rusty. It was quite a while since I'd "presented" into a microphone. And doing it at a distance from Rachel (she was in London; I was in Brighton on England's south coast) made it all feel somewhat uncomfortable at first.

But we soon relaxed into our chat, and were absorbed in comparing our chosen excerpts, sharing our own stories, and grappling with this thorny but very timely topic. We were able to get fascinating thoughts from luminaries like Emma Seppala, Robert Kaplan and Dorie Clark. And I think Rachel and I both had our personal ideas challenged – by testing the experts' theories in the context of today's world of work.

Publishing our podcast was a true team effort – involving lots more learning. We got feedback from Managing Editor Charlie Swift; technical advice from Head of Learning Experience (and experienced podcaster) Ross Garner; and a wealth of practical support from our colleague Matthew Hughes, who assumed the role of Producer and organized transcripts, liaised with Marketing, and handled the all-important uploading process – to every podcast platform we could think of!

Podcasting: an Enjoyable Challenge

Once Episode 1 was out there, we started gathering feedback from listeners to include in Episode 2. We also received ideas about what to focus on next – leading to us choosing the much-talked-about concept of "Psychological Safety."

Using our own interview with the expert who coined the phrase, Amy Edmondson, plus clips from an eclectic mix of well-known names, we put together our second podcast, once again navigating both conflicting and complementary ideas. It's a fascinating and challenging topic, and we ended up with plenty of questions as well as answers.

Before we finished, we looped back to the previous episode to share listeners' comments. That was a real "blast from the past" for me, reminding me powerfully of all the BBC shows I'd done over the years with opinionated – and often highly insightful – audiences. It was great to know that it wasn't just Rachel and me grappling with these topical issues. Our listeners were also thinking deeply about what the experts had to offer.

Let's Hear About Your Team!

We're about to release Episode 3: "What Makes a Great Team Now?" And what an appropriate question for Rachel and me! Over the last few months we've experienced many of the challenges and opportunities facing teams everywhere, as we've put together a new, virtual team for our podcast; set up systems; got to grips with the tech; and developed ways of working that play to everyone's strengths.

When you listen to the podcast, I hope you recognize some of the issues you're facing with your people – and get some new ideas for reaching your full potential as a team.

And if you do, why not tell us?

Help Us Produce Our Podcast

What's more, if new challenges spring up, in any area of your working life, please tell us about those as well.

Because we're always on the lookout for new themes for Expert Voices. We're bound to have interviewees in our archives with relevant research, fresh ideas, or practical advice to share. And Rachel and I will likely have our own experiences of your issues, too!

We want our podcast to become a useful part of people's career journeys. For my part, since first sitting down at a microphone all those years ago, I've experienced plenty of workplace challenges that would make great topics. But I'm sure you've got your own ideas.

After 30 years, I'm back behind the microphone. And, together with Rachel, I'm ready to broadcast expert insights on issues that matter to us all these days – including what you have to say!

Listen Now

The Mind Tools Expert Voices Podcast is free, and available in both audio and transcript formats.

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The 10 Most Difficult People (and the 5 Best Ways to Deal With Them!) https://www.mindtools.com/blog/the-10-most-difficult-people-and-the-5-best-ways-to-deal-with-them/ https://www.mindtools.com/blog/the-10-most-difficult-people-and-the-5-best-ways-to-deal-with-them/#comments Wed, 16 Mar 2022 12:00:00 +0000 https://www.mindtools.com/blog/?p=30502 "It's not that you have to love everybody else in the organization. But you do need to understand a few simple things. What are they trying to get done? What obstacles do they see? What skills do they bring?" – Amy Edmondson

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Difficult People Everywhere

"There are many types of annoying people," says teamwork consultant Ilene Marcus in our latest Expert Voices episode. And she's right, isn't she? If we're honest, we all know a large cast of characters who, in their own ways, rub us up completely the wrong way.

Whether they mean to do it or not, they're the people who aggravate, antagonize, fluster, and frustrate us – to the point that we can still feel our skin prickle with annoyance at the mere thought of them, decades down the line.

See how many of the following figures you recognize. They all make an appearance in our "Dealing With Difficult People" podcast, and I've met them all at some point during my career. Have you?

10 Types of Difficult People

1. The Know-it-All. This is someone who feels sure that they know more than you, everyone else on the team – and likely every other team, for that matter. As author and CEO Dana Borowka says, they have a "low tolerance for correction." They obstruct collaboration, and let others take the blame for mistakes.

2. The Interrupter. This character doesn't let you get a word in edgeways – either because they're not listening, or listening intently so that they can seize their second to jump in. They stop you contributing fully, and can even halt your train of thought in its tracks.

3. The Ignorer. For Professor Gretchen Spreitzer, this person's behavior typically involves "… ignoring somebody who's trying to clarify a point that they're making, or ignoring somebody in a hallway conversation." They choose carefully who they communicate with, and they make others feel irrelevant – or invisible.

4. The Bore. It's not just that the Bore doesn't offer anything interesting. They actively ignore people's signals that they're too busy, not interested, or have heard it all before.

5. The Prima Donna. Everything's about them: their ideas, their needs, their successes. In the words of Ilene Marcus, they're "… people that perform very well, but get on your last nerve – and take away from you driving the business agenda."

6. The Work Martyr. This is the person who never stops working (or telling you about it). Nothing you do ever comes close to the amount of time and energy they've put in. They grab every role and responsibility going – and expect you to be grateful.

7. The Whiner. The Whiner has what Dana Borowka calls "woe-is-me syndrome." "The world is so unfair! And they are just constantly complaining."

8. The Negativity Spreader. This is someone who's not content with just having negative feelings. They want to pass them on to everyone else. They steer every conversation toward the reasons why something won't work – and why you might as well give up now.

9. The Rainmaker. As Ilene Marcus says, "culture bends” for a Rainmaker. "They don't always adhere to team norms, but because they're the superstar everyone has to deal with the way they do their work."

10. The Boundary Crosser. This person invades your space, physically and emotionally. Whether they're reaching over your desk, borrowing your belongings without asking, or telling you more about their personal life than you're comfortable knowing, they breach your boundaries in annoying and unsettling ways.

Lessons From Expert Voices

In each Mind Tools Expert Voices podcast, my colleague Rachel Salaman tackles a particular workplace topic with the help of handpicked expert guests. Episode 9 explores the many ways that people can be difficult, and the best ways to respond.

In this snippet from the latest Expert Voices, our guests explain how to recognize difficult behavior and understand the impact it can have – in order to start dealing with it.

 

Dealing With Difficult People

Harvard-trained psychotherapist Katherine Crowley describes difficult people as "emotional traps." She says that their behavior "... stirs you up emotionally and causes turmoil in your day."

So what can we do about them?

Here are five strategies offered by Rachel's experts:

1. Recognize your feelings.

Several guests explore what's going on in our brains when someone annoys us.

Best-selling business writer Christine Comaford says it's about how we interpret their behavior. "You see things, you hear things, you smell things, you taste things, you feel things," she says. All of that information "… zooms into your brain stem, into your reptilian brain, then moves very quickly to your mammalian brain where emotions are attached, and then zooms to your prefrontal cortex where we make meaning."

Her first step to dealing with the subsequent feelings is simply to recognize them. "If we don't know how we're feeling – frustrated, overwhelmed, happy, peaceful, confident – then we can't navigate our emotions."

2. Tell them what's happening.

Next, we can open up a conversation. As Gretchen Spreitzer explains, "That doesn't have to be in a public way, but in a side conversation. 'You know, in the meeting we had today, I felt like you weren't hearing the point that I was trying to make, and in fact I felt like there were several times where I was interrupted,' as an example."

If we don't tell people what they're doing, how can we expect them to change?

3. Be curious.

We might also need to change our take on the situation. Christine Comaford recommends being curious: "… about the feelings that start to come up, based on the sensory data that you receive."

Maybe there are mitigating circumstances for someone's difficult behavior. Perhaps the cause is something that we're doing. And what if the intent we imagine simply isn't there, so there's no need for us to feel so annoyed?

4. Project positivity.

"One of the most effective things you can do," says leadership expert Olivia Fox Cabane, "is give them credit for the solution that you're going to be proposing." 

Author Rick Brinkman calls this "Pygmalion power." He believes that it can reduce your annoyance, and help to promote positive behavior in others. "Let's say somebody is being negative and we say to them, 'I appreciate you pointing out the problem so we can come up with the solutions,' that's projecting positive on them. You’re assuming they’re coming from the positive intention of wanting to improve things."

5. See the benefits.

"There's a benefit to a complainer," according to Dana Borowka. "They will identify issues that may be overlooked by people who always have that positive side."

And if people around you are whining or spreading negativity, perhaps it's a signal to get to know each other better, or to generate better energy within the team. As Gretchen Spreitzer says, "If we're having more fun in the workplace, we might be developing more trust, we might be getting to know the whole person at work in a way that then minimizes 'uncivil' behavior in the future."

Expect the Best From Problem People

We can take a great deal of hope from the way our experts deal with difficult people. Rick Brinkman sums up much of that in one sentence: "People will fall all over themselves to fulfill your positive expectations of them."

"It's not that you have to really get to know or love everybody else in the organization," says Amy Edmondson from Harvard Business School. "But you do need to understand a few simple things. Specifically, what are they trying to get done? What obstacles do they see ahead, and what skills and resources do they bring?"

We might even enjoy our interactions with them a bit more. Amy offers a quote that I'm going to try to remember the next time I'm with someone who usually gets my goat. It's from Abraham Lincoln, who said: "I don't like that man very much. I must get to know him better."

Listen to the Latest Episode of Mind Tools Expert Voices

Mind Tools Club Members and Corporate Licensees can listen to the full Expert Voices podcast now.

If you're not a Mind Tools member, you can join the Mind Tools Club and gain access to our 2,400+ resources, including a range of audio features. For corporate licensing, ask for a demo with one of our team.

What are your best strategies for dealing with people who frustrate, annoy and aggravate you at work? Who needs to change: them, you or both? And have you ever turned a tricky relationship around – with positive results for everyone? Please share your thoughts, below.

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How Authentic Should You Be at Work? https://www.mindtools.com/blog/how-authentic-should-you-be-at-work/ Wed, 16 Feb 2022 12:01:00 +0000 https://www.mindtools.com/blog/?p=30099 There are infinite ways to be authentic. And organizations need to make us all feel safe to be ourselves. But we should also take an honest look at the impact of our authenticity

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Which of the following two people do you think is most authentic?

Eva, who always says exactly how she feels – even to the point of using bad language to show the strength of her reactions. She talks openly about her personal life, cries in meetings, dances on tables at office parties, and is as likely to have colleagues hugging her in gratitude as shouting at her in anger. She's passionate and open about every aspect of her job.

Or Joe, who never lets his emotions loose at work, and gets everything done with the minimum of fuss. He's clear about what he will and will not do for others. He doesn't talk about his private life much, so meetings with him are focused and efficient. He doesn't like parties and usually doesn't go. But during office hours he's a calm, confident and kind member of the team.

Who's being more authentic at work?

Assessing Authenticity

I once worked at a radio station with both Eva and Joe (I've just changed their names). And at the time, I'd have said that Eva was the authentic one, honest about her experiences and emotions, and that Joe was fairly inauthentic, since he kept his "real self" hidden.

But, having listened to our latest Mind Tools Expert Voices podcast, my views have changed.

Looking back now, I think that they were both authentic in many ways.

However, both of them could also have made their authenticity work more in their favor – and in mine.

Lessons From Expert Voices

In each Mind Tools Expert Voices episode, my colleague Rachel Salaman tackles a particular workplace topic with the help of some well-qualified guests. Episode 8 explores all aspects of authenticity, including the question of how much authenticity we should aim for.

In this snippet from the latest Expert Voices, our guests discuss the best ways to "be yourself" at work.

What Is Authenticity?

Several of Rachel's guests point out that authenticity will always be hard to pin down, because it's about "being yourself" – and that's different for everyone. We all have unique personalities, including how gregarious we are, how we connect with others, and how much of ourselves we're happy to share. As award-winning CEO Sabrina Horn puts it, "Authenticity is like beauty: it's in the eye of the beholder. You have to decide for yourself what your core values are and who you are and what you stand for."

So authenticity involves self-knowledge, and the strength to stay true to yourself. Harvard's Amy Edmondson tells Rachel that it also requires the right environment – somewhere to feel "psychologically safe." What we have to ask ourselves, she says, is: "Do I feel OK around here? Is this a place where I can bring myself forward?"

For us to be open, honest, and fully engaged at work, our organizations need to be authentic, too. As Professor Gareth Jones says, "You want the organization to give you the chance to show your brightness and cleverness and innovation and creativity. Allowing people to show their skill and flourish is exactly what builds a great business."

The Benefits of Being Yourself

Whatever authenticity means in practice – for people, and the places where they work – there's broad agreement that it's a good thing. "That's how we're going to get more rigorous decisions," says author Frances Frei. "That's how we're going to be able to do things faster... do things at higher quality."

According to Annie McKee, who wrote the book "How to Be Happy at Work," being authentic "... helps us withstand the pressures that are inherent in our workplaces today."

Eva and Joe were both successful people, leading high-profile projects and progressing quickly in their careers.

And I think that, in different ways, they both gained a lot from staying true to themselves.

Eva was great at expressing her feelings, and encouraged others to be open and "real." Her candor was attractive and often persuasive to clients. And while she brought plenty of fun to the table, she was also able to have tough conversations when necessary. As Amy Edmondson tells Rachel, authenticity is "... not only saying nice things. It's about being candid. And if we aren't open and willing to take interpersonal risks, our organizations will face much bigger risks."

Joe's authenticity, on the other land, let him build a different kind of trust. He stuck to his own values of clarity and consistency, which gave an organized, predictable air to office life. You could rely on him: not to make you laugh, or let you in on his world outside of work, but to do his job well – and support you to do yours. He was good at what Professor Gretchen Spreitzer calls "job crafting": forging a role that increasingly matched his personality and purpose.

Authenticity Gaps

But Joe struggled to engage with people. He may have known himself well, but he never got to know the rest of us, and we didn't feel comfortable sharing anything personal with him. OK, he didn't like parties, and he held his ground on that. But that meant we could never celebrate as a full team.

Tim Baker says that authenticity involves "... genuinely engaging people in conversations around how we might make the workplace better, more effective, faster, safer, and all of those sorts of things." Joe always had a plan that he was happy with, but he wasn't interested in getting our insights or ideas.

Meanwhile, for all her fun and frankness, Eva often put the rest of us on edge. She was unpredictable, and her moods often dominated the day. She may have she showed that it was OK to open up, but she left little room for anyone else to do that too.

On the podcast, Amy Edmondson explains what can happen when people's authenticity is limited by others. "Not only do they hold back but they don't feel engaged. You know, their heart's not in it. And sometimes they don't feel as good about themselves."

Skillful Authenticity

So how do we achieve just the right amount of authenticity at work?

Author Frances Frei recommends that people like Eva "trim" their authenticity. "If your whole authenticity isn't a problem for your showing up but, wow, we just don't need to see that final 20 percent... I think it's a totally reasonable thing to do, to keep that 20 percent at home. It won't be inauthentic."

And Professor Gareth Jones tells people like Joe to be a little less self-possessed, and to find more similarities and connections with others. "We are not just saying 'be yourself.' You have to be yourself skillfully. Too much difference and things fall apart."

Making Authenticity Work

There are infinite ways to be authentic. And organizations need to make us all feel safe to be ourselves, if we're to do our best, to enjoy our jobs, and in turn to build businesses that people trust. In the words of Sabrina Horn, "'Fake it till you make it' is the worst business advice ever!"

But we should also take an honest look at the impact of our authenticity. Like Eva, it's possible to be too open; and like Joe, too secure in what works for us alone. We should be prepared to "trim" our instinctive approach at times, and to use authenticity skillfully, to get the balance right.

That way, we can be ourselves, but help others to be their best selves at work, too.

Listen to the Latest Episode of Mind Tools Expert Voices

Mind Tools Club Members and Corporate Licensees can listen to the full Expert Voices podcast now.

If you're not a Mind Tools member, you can join the Mind Tools Club and gain access to our 2,400+ resources, including a range of audio features. For corporate licensing, ask for a demo with one of our team.

What's Your Authentic Advice?

What do you think is the right level of authenticity to aim for? Why is it beneficial to be authentic at work? Are there times when it's particularly powerful to be yourself? And when should you "trim" your authenticity – for the good of others, and yourself? Please share your thoughts, below.

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Are You a Caterpillar or a Butterfly? – Planning Your Career From Here https://www.mindtools.com/blog/are-you-a-caterpillar-or-a-butterfly-planning-your-career-from-here/ Wed, 19 Jan 2022 12:00:00 +0000 https://www.mindtools.com/blog/?p=29757 My pay dropped significantly, and I had to learn to navigate the world of self-employment. It was scary – but exciting, too, because I was reshaping my career, and using a much wider range of experiences and skills

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When I listened to the latest episode of Mind Tools Expert Voices, I was reminded of a famous and influential book. It's a groundbreaking text that's been around for decades and read by millions, and one which – I believe – has a great deal to tell us about having a better career, and being happy and successful at work.

I'm talking about Eric Carle's timeless classic, "The Very Hungry Caterpillar."

Your Career Story

Storytelling in general is a powerful theme in the podcast. Experts like Robert Kaplan and Pippa Grange talk about "seizing the pen" and starting to write your own career narrative.

Other guests, including April Rinne and Dorie Clark, talk about finding your own sense of purpose as you plan your next steps. You stop being a character in someone else's story.

And there's a recurring point about regularly rewriting your career plan – because your job, your sector, and you, are in a constant state of flux. As educationalist Barbara Mistick puts it, "It's the end of the career 'track' as you know it."

Always Hungry for More

But what reminded me about "The Very Hungry Caterpillar" in particular was a comment from futurist April Rinne. "We've been taught," she tells my colleague Rachel Salaman, "that we will only really matter to the world if we have more, more, more, more, more."

And I instantly thought about the caterpillar at the start of Eric Carle's book. He eats one apple on Monday, two pears on Tuesday, and so on, until he's so full he feels sick. He's obsessed with getting more. But he also seems to be stuck on that old idea of a job "track," steadily plowing on with his work, day after day.

In the podcast, author Wilfred Emmanuel-Jones calls this "survival mentality." And that rang a bell with me, because there was a point in my career when every day felt like a battle to survive.

Thriving or Surviving?

I was working in education, and quickly moving forward in terms of job title, responsibilities and pay. But I'd reached a point where my well-being was in reverse.

The organization I worked for was under pressure, and everyone was stressed. We all had more to do than we could handle. There seemed to be new emergencies every week.

I knew I had the ability to make a difference. But too many things were getting in the way for me to have the impact I wanted.

As hard as I tried, I got very little satisfaction from my work, and I was struggling to see beyond the day-to-day grind.

I desperately needed a plan.

Lessons From Expert Voices

Mind Tools Expert Voices is the podcast where we explore key workplace topics with handpicked expert guests. The latest episode is about career planning, and how rewriting your story can help you to stay successful and satisfied at work.

In this snippet from the latest Expert Voices episode, our guests reveal how to have a focused but flexible approach to planning your career.

Butterfly Thinking for a Better Career

In Eric Carle's book, the hungry caterpillar eventually becomes a beautiful butterfly, and can then enjoy a rather different role – one that's more varied, less stressed, and presumably much more enjoyable than before.

For humans, however, it's not always easy to make that type of transition. It can feel scary to leave the familiar behind. There are risks involved in moving to new settings and taking on different challenges.

When I felt stuck, having people to talk to was vital. Friends helped me to think through my options, and several people suggested positive next steps. I didn't make a detailed map for the rest of my career, but I did decide on my first move – and then made it.

Leaving education meant that my pay dropped significantly, and I had to learn to navigate the world of self-employment. I financed some of my own training, and invested time in networking. It was scary – but exciting, too, because I was reshaping my career, and using a much wider range of experiences and skills.

Like a butterfly, I started to dip in and out of different, tempting-looking things. I had a much wider and more attractive viewpoint. I didn't feel trapped at ground level anymore.

How to Change Your Career Story

In the years since, I've developed what April Rinne calls a "portfolio career." In the podcast, she tells Rachel that this is "… a shift in how you think about what you're capable of doing, and what you want to do. So everything, every job, every skill, every role… the skills that you learn parenting… all of these things go into your portfolio."

You end up with a résumé that makes you "… uniquely positioned in your sector or in your organization. It's really empowering."

Work won't always go smoothly, of course. Many of our experts recognize that even small career shifts can be scary. I certainly had my fair share of knocks as I navigated my new path.

But not making changes is also a choice – and it can allow others to make choices for you, often not to your advantage. As Bill Wooditch puts it, "If you think about fear, maybe by procrastinating... you're creating a much, much tougher fear for yourself than going after something."

My Life as a Butterfly

As the next phase of my career began, I was energized to run projects of my own, and to explore opportunities that I'd have been too busy, or too scared, to consider before. After a couple of years working alone, I saw a chance to take on a team role in an unfamiliar sector – and seized it.

Suddenly I was working in an exciting new industry, and my daily life was very different from when I'd been at my "dead end." I was interested in work again, and felt like I was having an impact. My new environment suited me. I could use my full portfolio of experiences and strengths.

I only wish I'd taken control of my career story – and spread my wings – a bit sooner. As Barbara Mistick says, "If you can tap into your passion for work, then your level of engagement changes and your ability to be successful changes." It's a virtuous circle. As in Eric Carle's book, the sun shines!

Building a Better Career From Here

The Expert Voices podcast has a wealth of ideas for finding good places to work, and great jobs to do – ones that match where you are in your life now, and where you want to go next.

In my experience, the first step is the hardest. But if you're pursuing your interests, and finding new ways to bring value and find satisfaction, you'll be moving toward something better. You'll be on what Richard Shell from the Wharton School calls the "windy path" to career success.

In short, you'll be turning into a butterfly! You'll spot more opportunities from up there, and enjoy a richer life now.

And I'm not the only one who sees butterflies as a good symbol for happiness. When Richard gives Rachel his take on career planning, he says something that took me straight back to my favorite children's book:

"It's very hard to catch a butterfly. But if you go someplace where there are butterflies and you just sit down and be still, a butterfly will very likely come and sit on your shoulder. And I think happiness is like that.

"If you spend your life chasing it, it's pretty hard to catch. But if you go to places where there's a good chance that your talents, your emotions, your relationships will be in resonance with that situation and just sit there, the chances are pretty good the happiness will find you."

Listen to the Latest Episode of Mind Tools Expert Voices

Mind Tools Club Members and Corporate Licensees can listen to the full Expert Voices podcast now.

If you're not a Mind Tools member, you can join the Mind Tools Club and gain access to our 2,400+ resources, including a range of audio features. For corporate licensing, ask for a demo with one of our team.

What Are Your Career-Planning Tips?

How are you shaping your career from here? What's worked for you in the past, and when have you learned from your mistakes? Please share your experiences, insights and ideas, below.

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"Mr Creativity": My Friend Tony Buzan https://www.mindtools.com/blog/mr-creativity-my-friend-tony-buzan/ Wed, 22 Dec 2021 12:01:00 +0000 https://www.mindtools.com/blog/?p=29427 For me, Tony Buzan was the embodiment of creativity. With a twinkling smile, bright eyes, and flamboyant, fast-moving hands, he shone with creative energy

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Who's the most creative person you know? Someone who revels in generating clever and quirky ideas, with an endlessly inventive outlook and a wide spread of interests. Who surprises you with the connections they make and the solutions they come up with. Someone who just thinks differently.

When I listened to the latest Expert Voices episode, "How to Be Creative," one person came to my mind again and again. He's a man I got to know well, and whose creativity I witnessed at close quarters many times.

He's also someone who gained international fame for his creativity: the Mind Maps inventor, best-selling author, poet, showman, and all-round creative dynamo, Tony Buzan.

Who Was Tony Buzan?

I first heard about Tony Buzan when I was at school. In a study-skills lesson, our teacher explained Mind Mapping – the creativity tool that Tony had named and popularized.

I took to Mind Mapping immediately. It was a very effective way to explore ideas, stimulate understanding and creative thinking, and boost memory. Mind Maps helped me in my studies, particularly when exams came around. I also used them to solve problems and plan activities in my own time.

I got hold of several other Buzan books, and his tips and techniques played a big part in developing my fascination with thinking and learning.

So I felt quite star-struck when, a few years later, I got to meet the man himself.

Tony Buzan and Me

I'd entered a competition that Tony Buzan had helped to organize, and I spent a whole day watching him charm, amuse, entertain, and impress participants and audience members alike.

I finished the day as a medalist, and suddenly I was being interviewed alongside Tony himself – and then going to a restaurant with him and some of the other winners.

He was a fun and fascinating man to be around. And that was just the first of several dinners we had together, because we stayed in touch and talked, worked and even performed together a number of times after that.

Tony Buzan and Jonathan Hancock
Tony Buzan and Jonathan Hancock in 1994.

"Mr Creativity"

For me, Tony Buzan was the embodiment of creativity. With a twinkling smile, bright eyes, and flamboyant, fast-moving hands, he shone with creative energy. It allowed him to produce a vast amount of ground-breaking work, and also to promote his ideas passionately – and empower creativity in others. Because he was convinced that everyone should and could be more creative.

That's a big theme in "How to Be Creative." Chris Lewis, founder of one of the largest independent marketing and communications agencies in the world, tells my colleague Rachel Salaman that "… problem solving is something everybody needs to do these days."

In the words of lawyer-turned-entrepreneur Jonathan Fields, "The truth is, we're all creative, we all create on very intense levels throughout our day."

And author Linda Rottenberg says that we need to throw off any worries about doing the wrong thing, and just let our creativity loose. "We can do it! We can zig when everyone else zags!"

Making Creative Connections

Tony certainly loved to challenge convention. He saw Mind Mapping as a way to revolutionize note taking and list making. But it was also as a way to be more challenging, to uncover new possibilities, to think differently. And for him, the key to creative thinking was connectivity.

Mind Maps use connections to improve understanding, but also to allow new ideas to emerge. And Tony was just as interested in personal connections, keen to swap ideas with anyone and everyone.

In the podcast, Thomas Wedell-Wedellsborg talks about connecting with people from different departments, to "spin off new ideas." "Good ideas tend to come when new worlds meet," he says. That would have made Tony smile. I remember being at a dinner with him once, and seeing him in deep discussion with a waiter about methods for keeping food warm. The next moment he was talking about environmental policy with a member of European royalty.

Creative Inputs

I'm sure that Tony would also have agreed with author and speaker Josh Linkner, who talks to Rachel about "gobbling up creative inputs" to fire his inventiveness. "I'm absorbing the creativity of others to get my juices flowing," he says.

Tony seized every opportunity to widen his experiences and enrich his knowledge. Once, we were traveling together and he dropped a pile of newspapers into my lap. He had his own set, and instructed me to read the sports, showbiz and even the gossip articles as eagerly as those about politics, the environment or the arts.

As Thomas Wedell-Wedellsborg says in the podcast, "The second you start learning something that's different from your own world, that's when you start to get inspired."

Lessons From Expert Voices

Mind Tools Expert Voices is the podcast series where we delve into our 200+ Expert Interviews, to explore a particular question or theme.

In episode six, "Be More Creative," host Rachel Salaman hears some of the secrets of highly creative people from experts including Melanie Katzman, Josh Linkner, April Rinne, and Rowan Gibson.

In this snippet from the latest Expert Voices episode, our guests reveal how we can all be more creative – and inspire others to unleash their creativity, too.

Creativity: Unconventional and Unafraid

For Tony Buzan, it was important to break away from conventional ways of thinking and doing. If the food he fancied wasn't on a restaurant menu, for example, he'd simply invent a dish and explain the ingredients and method to the chef.

Once when were on a radio show together, the presenter explained the format. Tony said, "OK, but why don't we do it like this instead" – then got the host to agree to a completely different – and much better – approach.

Not everything he did worked, but he never let anxiety hold back his creativity. This chimes with what futurist April Rinne tells Rachel about not fearing the worst, and not trying to control everything. If we do that, she says, "We're blinding ourselves. We're leaving opportunities on the table – not seeing all of the amazing things that could happen as well."

Having said that, Tony did need to control some things. He organized his time ruthlessly, and followed several strict routines every day. In the podcast, Jonathan Fields talks about "certainty anchors" – routine actions that free up other parts of your brain for creativity – and Tony was a big believer in these, particularly when he was writing. Several times, when I phoned him, one of his secretaries told me in no uncertain terms that he wasn't to be disturbed. I got to know when he'd be at his familiar desk, with the right stationery, for an agreed length of time – and that he'd only phone back when that particular routine was done.

Healthy, Happy Creativity

Jonathan Fields also tells Rachel about the link between good physical health and high-quality creativity. "Mens sana in corpore sano" – "a healthy mind in a healthy body" – was practically Tony's catchphrase. He loved martial arts, worked with Olympic rowers, and was delighted to hear that I'd taken up running.

As Jonathan Fields says, "There's tremendous research around the impact of movement and meditation on the creative process, on cognitive function, on problem solving, on creativity."

There are descriptions of creativity throughout Expert Voices that could have been written about Tony Buzan. But perhaps the one that chimes most with me is about fun. Chris Lewis calls it "the tragedy of the modern workplace" that so many people don't enjoy what they're doing, when creativity and happiness are so closely linked. And Tony laughed a lot. He loved wordplay, told hilarious stories, and found a funny side to almost any challenge.

Once, when our taxi was stuck in a traffic queue, he joked with the driver about a ridiculous shortcut... which sparked an idea... which got us where we needed to be with seconds to spare!

Creative Inspiration

The message that comes through this podcast is that we can all be more creative. By having the confidence to think unconventionally, the energy to make connections, the commitment to our intellectual and physical development – and by having fun while we're at it – we can boost our creativity, and benefit from it in everything we do.

And in my life, no one has proved that more conclusively than the marvelous and much-missed Tony Buzan.

A creative Christmas card from Tony Buzan
A creative greeting from Tony Buzan.

Listen to the Latest Episode of Mind Tools Expert Voices

Mind Tools Club Members and Corporate Licensees can listen to the full Expert Voices podcast now.

If you're not a Mind Tools member, you can join the Mind Tools Club and gain access to our 2,400+ resources, including a range of audio features. For corporate licensing, ask for a demo with one of our team.

Whose Creativity Do You Celebrate?

Which creative characters have been inspirational in your life? Who best represents creativity to you and what have you learned from them? Please share your examples, experiences and insights, below.

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5 Negotiation Lessons From My Lockdown Puppy https://www.mindtools.com/blog/5-negotiation-lessons-from-my-lockdown-puppy/ https://www.mindtools.com/blog/5-negotiation-lessons-from-my-lockdown-puppy/#comments Thu, 18 Nov 2021 12:01:00 +0000 https://www.mindtools.com/blog/?p=29047 He's our first dog, and I knew we had plenty to learn. But it never occurred to me that negotiation would be so high on the skill list

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I've learned a lot about negotiation in the past year.

I've pitted my wits against an extremely complex character. He can be cooperative one moment, then stubbornly committed to his own needs the next. He's hard to read, capable of playing high-level mind games, and he's pushed my negotiating skills to the limit.

Welcome to life with a pandemic pup.

Dogged Determination – and Deal Making

Like so many other families, in the depths of a coronavirus lockdown, we bought a puppy. Ours is a cavapoo (half Cavalier King Charles spaniel, half poodle) called Enzo.

Enzo: a cavapoo puppy.

He's our first dog, and I knew we had plenty to learn. But it never occurred to me that negotiation would be so high on the skill list.

After all, we're a loving family with a warm house and an unfussy garden. He'd just be glad to be here, and happy to fit in, right? And if he ever got a bit above himself, my firm but fair authority would quickly bring him into line.

That's not exactly how it went.

The Ups and Downs of Dog Ownership

Don't get me wrong: it's not all been a battle. Enzo really does seem to like living with us. And we love having him here. Often he'll happily go along with whatever we want to do.

Until he doesn't.

Like when he's found an interesting piece of trash in the street, and doesn't see why he should drop it before he joins me on the sofa. Or when I'm deep in my work, but he's determined that it's time to play.

Enzo sitting with a tennis ball.

It's in moments like these that my negotiation skills have been tested – but also, I like to think, trained – by my new best friend.

Lessons From Expert Voices

We all need to know how to negotiate. As my colleague Rachel Salaman says in the latest Expert Voices podcast, "So much of life is negotiation – at work and at home. It all involves some level of maneuvering and bargaining until there's a plan that everyone can agree to."

In this snippet from the latest Expert Voices episode, our guests reveal some of the secrets of successful negotiation.

I listened to Rachel's podcast with Enzo sleeping soundly by my feet. And I'm now confident that I've developed some valuable and highly transferable skills this year.

When Enzo gets around to listening, I'm sure he'll be happy too – because our experts' key themes are very much in tune with the lessons he's taught me.

5 Steps to Successful Negotiation

1. Be positive.

I learned early on to head off arguments by making our interactions as positive as possible. I try to reward everything Enzo does right. And if I have to stand my ground on something, I offer him something else that he'll be happy with.

That approach chimes with advice from influential businesswoman and author Robin Koval. "If you're not able to agree with what someone is saying," she tells Rachel, "then you need to find a way to tell them that, but also put something positive into the mix."

2. Be clear about what you want and need.

For Corey Kupfer, author of "Authentic Negotiating," clarity is key. "It's clarity on your objectives," he says. "Exactly what do you want on every major term on this deal?"

That's something I didn't do in the early days with Enzo – and I paid the price. I just wanted him to be good, to stay calm, to let me work… but I wasn't clear about exactly what that would look like. So how was he supposed to know? And how would I ever guide him to do what I wanted?

3. Prepare thoroughly.

I've learned to have things like toys, blankets and water ready for Enzo before he even realizes he needs them. I've worked on my emotions, too, so that I stay calm. And, thanks to some advice from a behaviorist, I've now got plenty of tactics to try if things start going wrong.

According to Alexandra Carter, a negotiation trainer with the U.N., it's careful preparation like this that guards against what she calls a "one-car accident." A negotiation that fails, she says, usually does so "… well before the other person. It starts with you."

And Corey Kupfer agrees. "Take the time to prepare, and be willing to do the hard work for any negotiation that counts."

4. Don't try to "win."

Enzo and I know that all-or-nothing negotiations tend to leave both parties dissatisfied (and sometimes with precious clothing items badly ripped). As Robin Koval puts it, "Don't think about 'my slice versus your slice' and 'if you get something I don't get something.'"

Now, when we're deciding how long a game's going to last, or which direction to take for a walk, we're both willing to give a little ground – to find a way that we can both be happy.

5. Learn to steer the relationship.

I'm sure Enzo and I will keep refining the way we negotiate. And that's essential, according to Alexandra Carter. She describes negotiation as "steering relationships," often over the long term.

On the surface, you may be bargaining over deadlines or costs (or the difference between a chewable toy and a valuable piece of home furnishing). But, as Alexandra sees it, you're also "… teaching somebody how to value you, how to think about your business or how to think about you personally."

Noble Negotiation

One theme from the podcast resonated with me particularly strongly. That, if you've negotiated well, you won't just feel good about what you've achieved. You'll also feel proud of how you've done it.

At the start, I could usually get Enzo to do what I wanted – eventually. But I wasn't always happy with how I got him there.

But now, thanks to positivity, clarity, preparation, and good old-fashioned give-and-take, we've got so much better at making deals that we're both OK with.

So it's not just him being a "good boy." I'm finally feeling happy with my behavior, too.

Enzo sitting on Jonathan's lap.

Listen to the Latest Episode of Mind Tools Expert Voices

Mind Tools Club members and Corporate licensees can listen to the full Expert Voices podcast now.

If you're not a Mind Tools member, you can join the Mind Tools Club and gain access to our 2,400+ resources, including a range of audio features. For corporate licensing, ask for a demo with one of our team.

What Are the Secrets of Successful Negotiation? Have Your Say!

What's your approach to negotiation? What works – and what doesn't – when you need to make a deal? Please share your experiences, insights and tips, below.

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How to Be a Great Leader – Mind Tools Expert Voices https://www.mindtools.com/blog/how-to-be-a-great-leader-mind-tools-expert-voices/ https://www.mindtools.com/blog/how-to-be-a-great-leader-mind-tools-expert-voices/#comments Wed, 20 Oct 2021 12:00:00 +0000 https://www.mindtools.com/blog/?p=28699 We weren’t friends with him. He was still our boss. But we all saw his empathic and supportive behavior in action. It brought us together as a team – firmly behind him as our leader

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Imagine this. You're driving for work late one evening when your car breaks down on a lonely road.

You call the office for advice, and it's your boss who picks up the phone.

What happens next?

A Lesson in Leadership

l was in that exact situation about thirty years ago, shortly after starting my first real job.

I'd been sent out in an unfamiliar company car, and for some reason I hadn't spotted that it was nearly out of gas. By the time it finally spluttered to a halt, I was on a deserted country road, night was falling, and there was no one around to help.

When my phone call was answered, and it was the manager of my team – a senior leader in the whole organization – my heart sank for a moment.

But instead of tearing into me, pointing out how stupid I'd been, or even just handing me off to someone else, John chuckled, told me not to worry, and asked how he could help.

A few minutes later he'd arranged for a local garage to come and refuel the car as soon as they could. And, to save me waiting, he'd set off on his motorbike to bring me home.

Leadership That Lasts

I learned a lot about John's leadership that night. Over the next few years, he further established himself as a great leader in my eyes – by what he did, but also by the sort of person he was.

And when I listened to our latest Expert Voices podcast this week, I recognized in John's personal attributes many of the leadership traits mentioned by our guests. The kinds of things that make you remember someone's leadership three decades on.

Lessons From Expert Voices

Mind Tools Expert Voices is the podcast series where we delve into our 200+ Expert Interviews, to explore a particular question or theme.

In episode four, "How to Be a Great Leader," my colleague Rachel Salaman gets insights and ideas from experts including Frances Frei, Ashley Goodall and Fred Kiel. They tell her what's special about the best leaders – and how we can be more like them.

In this snippet from the latest Expert Voices episode, our guests highlight some of the key leadership traits needed in today's workplace.

A Servant Leader

In my moment of need, John helped. He did that by listening properly to what my problem was, talking to me about what he could do – and then doing it. It didn't matter that he was way above me in the company hierarchy, or that he had a hugely challenging and time-consuming job. When my call came in, I was his priority.

Leadership professor Sen Sendjaya calls this "servant leadership." It takes humility, the willingness to admit to your own mistakes, and the commitment to support your people to do their best. "It's not being inferior, but it's also not being superior," Sen tells Rachel in the podcast. Servant leaders know their own strengths and weaknesses. So they can also help others to understand theirs.

Leading by Example

John often deferred to people who were better at something than him. He gave us all appropriate opportunities to grow, and was happy for us to shine.

But he was also very good at the core aspects of his job. Executive coach Ashley Goodall highlights this as a key leadership trait. "You're following them because they're really good at something that you care about," he says of great leaders. "That removes a little bit of your doubt about the future, a little bit of your uncertainty."

A key part of John's leadership power was his consistency – another trait mentioned by many of our podcast guests. He was always calm in a crisis, and his down-to-earth approach to decision making meant that we all understood his thinking. We knew where we stood with him, whether it was a minor matter or something that would affect the whole business. In the words of leadership consultant Kate Sweetman, during some turbulent times, he was "one of those rocks you wish you had."

He wasn't a pushover, though. He made tough calls when he had to, and held us all accountable in our roles. But he did so in a relentlessly positive way – what Susan Scott calls "holding people able." He set us high targets, believed that we could achieve them, and his confidence rubbed off.

What's more, he modeled accountability himself. He was highly visible in his own contributions, but also disarmingly honest if he ever failed to deliver. He encouraged us to be open about our mistakes – like my failure with the fuel gauge – and to learn from them. According to influential author Fred Kiel, too many leaders see that as a show of weakness, when it's really "… a sign of tremendous strength."

An Authentic Leader

More than anything, John was real. He shared stories from outside work, took part in social events, and leveled with us whenever he could. Leadership coach Bruna Martinuzzi says that. "… without authenticity or integrity a leader has no credibility."

And fellow podcast guest Frances Frei, from Harvard Business School, says that authenticity creates valuable trust within teams. "You're more likely to trust me if you get a sense that I am really in it for you and for the broader group."

That was certainly true with John. We weren't friends with him (even if we'd been rescued on his motorbike!). He was still our boss. But we all saw his empathic and supportive behavior in action. It brought us together as a team – firmly behind him as our leader.

Put Your Leadership to the Test

I've known other great leaders since John (and some not-so-great ones!). When I think about the best of the bunch, the same defining characteristics keep coming up: humility, consistency, accountability, authenticity. And, perhaps more than anything, the willingness to listen to someone in their moment of need, and the instinct to offer the right kind of help.

So Rachel's podcast guests chime with my own experiences. They've also given me ways to lift my own leadership skills. I recommend you have a listen, too, to better understand the people who lead you – and maybe raise your own game.

But if you do want to impress me as a leader, you'll always have to pass my "motorbike test."

If I phoned you after hours from a dark roadside, how would you respond?

Listen to the Latest Episode of Mind Tools Expert Voices

Mind Tools Club Members and Corporate Licensees can listen to the full Expert Voices podcast now.

If you're not a Mind Tools member, you can join the Mind Tools Club and gain access to our 2,400+ resources, including a range of audio features. For corporate licensing, ask for a demo with one of our team.

What Makes a Great Leader? Have Your Say!

Which personal characteristics are crucial for leaders? What is it about the best leaders that makes people want to follow them? Please share your experiences, insights and tips, below.

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Take Charge of Your Time – Mind Tools Expert Voices https://www.mindtools.com/blog/take-charge-of-your-time-mind-tools-expert-voices/ https://www.mindtools.com/blog/take-charge-of-your-time-mind-tools-expert-voices/#comments Wed, 22 Sep 2021 11:01:00 +0000 https://www.mindtools.com/blog/?p=28289 Recently I've gained more choices about how to organize my time. And it's made me look more closely at how well I'm really doing it

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I'm a repeat victim of Parkinson's Law. It's the principle that, like gas in a container, work expands to fill the time available. And it gets me again and again.

Take the article I wrote yesterday. It should have taken me three hours or so. But I had all day to do it – and guess what? It took me all day to do it! A bit longer, in fact, as I was still tidying it up 15 minutes after I should have finished my working day.

Mixed Feelings About Multitasking

I suppose I didn't just write that article. I kept on top of my emails and instant messages throughout the day, did some research for several other projects, and planned a blog that's due next week.

And part of me thinks that switching between jobs like this makes me more productive, because it keeps me energized and on top of all my work.

But another part knows that I could have written that article in one go. If I'd given it my full attention, and only then moved on to other things, it may well have been more coherent as a result. And I'd likely have closed up my laptop on time.

Lessons From Expert Voices

Mind Tools Expert Voices is the podcast series where we explore our 200+ Expert Interviews, on the lookout for insights that are particularly relevant now.

In episode three, "Take Charge of Your Time," my colleague Rachel Salaman guides us through a range of strategies for using our days well, getting more done – and staying healthy and happy in the process.

In this snippet from the latest Expert Voices episode, our guests explain why using time consciously is key. By staying focused, and being clear about our goals, they believe that we can start using every moment to the full.

In Charge of My Time

I've always had a fair bit of flexibility in my role, and I appreciate it – most of the time. I enjoy organizing my own writing and editing schedule for the day, and I'm pretty good at getting everything done and coordinating with my colleagues.

But recently – like many people – I've gained even more choices about how to organize my time. And it's made me look more closely at how well I'm really doing it.

A Flexible Future

Using lessons learned in lockdown, our company has recently adopted a flexible working policy, meaning that we all get to choose where we work from and, to a large extent, when we do it. It's great: we can plan our time to be as productive as possible. And we can integrate our work and life, so that they complement each other rather than cause conflict.

That's the idea, at least. However, for me, the first few weeks of the policy have shone light on some less-than-perfect time-management tactics.

So I think it's time to be honest with myself.

My "Switchtasking Syndrome"

If I've got all day – or longer – to get something done, why does it need to take that long? In the past, I've told myself that it gives me a better chance to be sure of my ideas, and time to keep tweaking my writing until it’s perfect.

But instead of continually pausing while I flit to other things, what if I just focused on one thing until it was done?

That would make scientific sense, says management expert Dave Crenshaw. "The brain is just not able to handle multiple active tasks at the same time," he explains.

Productivity guru Chris Bailey agrees. "Single tasking is one of the best ways, in the moment, to bring more attention to what's in front of you and not more time. Productivity is the process of working more deliberately and more intentionally." 

Time Management – Moment by Moment

According to Ashley Whillans from Harvard Business School, instead of energizing me, my task shifting may actually be opening up spaces for time to slip through. She recommends "… being more deliberate about small moments of free time that we often waste, the gaps in between meetings where we'll just answer emails as if they were urgent but maybe not pick up the phone and call a friend." 

Since I'm being honest, I'll admit that checking emails is sometimes just a delaying tactic – however much I tell myself that I'm coordinating or collaborating with my team. And when I'm switching between tasks, coffee always seems that bit more tempting!

Can I Be Flexible and Focused?

Maybe I'm valuing my new-found flexibility a bit too much, and not paying enough attention to the value of my time.

Being able to work when and where I want certainly helps to keep my stress levels low. But if I end up taking longer than necessary, and spreading my attention thinly, is flexible working really working for me?

One answer, according to podcast guest Patricia Walsh, is to look more to the bigger picture. A champion athlete – and blind since the age of 14 – Patricia maps her day-to-day tasks to her longer-term ambitions – the things that she's really passionate about achieving. That, she says, helps her to get through her To-Do List efficiently, because she can always see how those tasks are getting her closer to her most important goals.

And performance coach Andy Core is someone else who recommends staying "in the zone" rather than swapping between tasks. "Take one thing at a time," he says. "Plug it in – and don't give up and don't let yourself be distracted."

Maybe that's the way I should be energizing myself, rather than switching between tasks. As well as ensuring that I finish on time, it might also help me to push forward my longer-term goals. I love Andy's description of motivation being "just momentum in disguise."

Time to Break the Law?

Forward movement is all well and good, but we also need to know when to stop. Like me, Chris Bailey often fell foul of Parkinson's Law, until he experimented by working some 90-hour weeks, and some 20-hour ones. Although he felt much more productive putting in 90 hours, he found that he actually got only slightly more done than when he stopped at 20.

So, as excited as I am about flexible working in general, I've decided to start being a little less flexible about my use of time.

I'm still going to embrace the extra independence I've got to organize my day. But I'm going to "taskswitch" less, and stay "in the zone" more. And I'm going to use my long-term goals to spur me on through my To-Do List.

I'm hoping that this will help me to recalibrate the way I value time, and become more disciplined about when I switch off. I want to protect my time away from work – so that I'm fresher and more effective when I turn on my laptop again.

That's the plan, anyway. Whether I'll be able to stick to my good intentions... well, I guess only time will tell.

Listen to the Latest Episode of Mind Tools Expert Voices

Mind Tools Club Members and Corporate Licensees can listen to the full Expert Voices podcast now.

If you’re not a Mind Tools member, you can join the Mind Tools Club and gain access to our 2,400+ resources, including a range of audio features. For corporate licensing, ask for a demo with one of our team.

Taking Charge of Your Time: Have Your Say!

How well do you use your time? Can you accomplish what you need to, and want to, every day? Is it helpful to have more choices now – or is it harder than ever to make the most of your time? Please find a moment to share your experiences, insights and tips, below.

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Reconnecting After COVID – Mind Tools Expert Voices https://www.mindtools.com/blog/reconnecting-after-covid/ Wed, 18 Aug 2021 10:00:00 +0000 https://www.mindtools.com/blog/?p=27823 Being able to work from home has been invaluable during the pandemic. But after all this time I can feel myself itching to get back to the office. To experience a morsel of that busy lifestyle I used to complain so much about

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A couple years ago, the end of the working week meant dashing out of the office doors to save myself even a handful of precious weekend minutes in excruciating traffic. 

Now, as the clock hits four o'clock, I simply close my computer, and sift through my phone to kill time until "Zoom drinks" at eight. 

Being able to work from home has been invaluable during the pandemic. But after all this time I can feel myself itching to get back to the office. To experience a morsel of that busy lifestyle I used to complain so much about. To talk to real-life people instead of my houseplants, and to experience the energy of a bustling office rather than the solitude of my tiny apartment. 

But I'm afraid that all these months away may have cost me valuable social skills, and potentially damaged my work relationships beyond repair. Have I forgotten how to interact meaningfully with my peers? And even worse, is it too late to reconnect? 

Losing Touch 

Before the pandemic, I knew just about everyone I worked with. Even if our roles didn't cross over, I'd have at least sat down for a coffee, or exchanged TV show recommendations with everyone at least once. 

Now my colleagues appear as a collection of pixels on my screen, and I feel like I've lost touch. People have left, new starters have joined, and I no longer have a clear picture of the wider team I work in. I fear that the office will be unrecognizable, and so will the faces inside it. 

Reconnecting? Be Patient 

In reality, most of my co-workers likely feel the exact same way. Working in a pandemic has been a steep and unexpected learning curve for everyone, so it’s important to be patient with ourselves and one another. 

Don't be afraid to introduce yourself to those who may not have met you in the outside world. Run icebreaker sessions to get to know one another again. Conversations may be stilted or awkward at first, but give it time. 

Everyone will need to reintegrate into the daily routine, so don't be afraid to set boundaries and give one another space. 

Treat Others With Kindness

According to Mind Tools' Expert Interview guests, it's important that we work with kindness and compassion. People will have mixed feelings about returning to the office. Some will be eager to "get back to normal," while others may be anxious about the potential risks. 

Emotions may be running high so be respectful of your colleagues' concerns. Where appropriate, lend a helping hand or offer a comforting word.  

Stay in the Moment When Reconnecting

Daniel Goleman – a leading voice in emotional intelligence – believes that taking time to "stay present" is key to reconnecting with others. He said, "Look at your priorities in the day. Do you make time for yourself? Do you make time to reflect?" Checking in on yourself and cutting out distractions will not only help to minimize feelings of anxiety or worry, but also make you more approachable to your peers. 

This sentiment was echoed by Stanford University’s Emma Seppala who believes that being present and compassionate with others is essential to "human connection" and building better relationships. 

"Treat Ourselves as We Would Treat Others" 

Author Tal Ben-Shahar asserts that to build empathetic connections with others, we first need to treat ourselves with the same kindness. 

He said, "Would we be very harsh on a person if they stumbled in a speech? Would we be extremely hard on a person if they didn't get it right the first time? Of course not. So why treat ourselves using different standards?" 

So, cut yourself some slack and don't beat yourself up if it takes you longer to assimilate into the "new normal" than you'd like. 

Lessons From Expert Voices

Mind Tools Expert Voices is our new podcast series where we delve into the archive of our 200+ Expert Interviews to find the insights that we need now. 

In episode two, "Reconnecting After COVID," my colleague Rachel Salaman takes us through some of the most useful wisdom she's gathered from her interviewees over the years, introducing clips from her chats with Dr Srikumar Rao, Daniel Goleman, Emma Seppala, Tal Ben-Shahar, and more.  

Listen to the Second Episode of Mind Tools Expert Voices 

In the snippet of our new Expert Voices podcast, below, our guests discuss why empathy and kindness are key to rebuilding relationships.

You can listen to the full Expert Voices podcast now.

If you're not a Mind Tools member, you can join the Mind Tools Club and gain access to our 2,400+ resources, including a range of audio features. For corporate licensing, ask for a demo with one of our team.  

How are you feeling about life after lockdown? Has the pandemic taken its toll on your positivity and passion? Share your experiences and tips, below.

The post Reconnecting After COVID – Mind Tools Expert Voices appeared first on Mind Tools.

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Will I Be Happy in the New Normal? - Mind Tools Expert Voices https://www.mindtools.com/blog/expert-voices-happy-in-the-new-normal/ Thu, 08 Jul 2021 11:01:00 +0000 https://www.mindtools.com/blog/?p=27116 "Expert Voices" is our new podcast series, gathering together insights and ideas from a range of experts. In episode one we hear about tactics to foster happiness in the "new normal"

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Remember water coolers and casual chats with colleagues? How about away days, team-building events, and office parties? Sitting near other people? Even just leaving the house for the day? Remember any of that?

The pandemic has affected people's working lives very differently. Some of us have carried on with our jobs throughout, or have been back in shared workplaces for a while now. Others are still locked down and working remotely. And of course, a significant number of people have lost their jobs – or are seriously worried about doing so.

After so much change, hardship – and heartbreak – and with so many things still uncertain, can we ever be happy again at work?

Lessons From Expert Voices

"Mind Tools Expert Voices" is our new podcast series where we delve into the archive of our 200+ Expert Interviews to find the insights that we need now.

In episode one, "How to Be Happy in the New Normal," my colleague Rachel Salaman takes us through some of the most useful wisdom she's gathered from her interviewees over the years on the subject of happiness, introducing clips from her chats with Dr Srikumar Rao, Daniel Goleman, Emma Seppala, Tal Ben-Shahar, and more.

In this preview of our new Expert Voices podcast, our guests share ways to make happiness happen – even in challenging times like these.

Mixed Feelings About the "New Normal"

In many ways, I'm eager to get back to the office. I've missed catching up with my colleagues during breaks and lunchtimes, and getting to chat with people on other teams. I'm hungry to feel focused and creative again among a group of like-minded teammates. I'm sick of seeing a sea of faces on a virtual screen, and I've had enough of my own four walls at home. I even miss the office coffee.

Having said that…

What will it be like to battle the rush-hour traffic? To be around lots of people again? To cope with all of their fears and frustrations, as well as my own?

When we do return, we'll still have some COVID restrictions in place. So, for a while, it certainly won't be the same workplace I left – and it may never be again.

I want to feel excited about going back. I want to be happy again. But my feelings about this next phase are mixed, to say the least.

What Can I Do to Be Happy at Work?

It's tempting to assume that happiness either comes (or doesn't) from whatever happens to us. Right now, that can make us focus on other people's decisions, about things like where, when and how we work – and how we feel as a result.

But, according to many of Rachel's Expert Interview guests, we don't just have to react to what comes next. We can play a proactive role in determining how happy we feel.

"We Are Responsible For Our Own Happiness"

Those are the words of Annie McKee, a Senior Fellow at the University of Pennsylvania, and author of the book "How to Be Happy at Work." She wrote it well before COVID, but its key messages are more relevant than ever.

She talks about getting ownership of your experiences, being realistic but also hopeful, and taking small but meaningful steps toward greater happiness – for yourself and others.

Other experts we spoke to are equally optimistic. Daniel Goleman, the pioneer of Emotional Intelligence, explained how meditation can help us to find calm in periods of turbulence, and withstand the sorts of "emotional hijacks" that we'll likely face in the coming weeks and months.

And Emma Seppala from Stanford University told us about the "science of happiness" – including how to train your resilience and make better choices between negative and positive thoughts.

Go Easy On Yourself

Emma also focuses on compassion – for others, and ourselves – and that was a common theme among the experts that resonated particularly strongly with me.

I'm keen to do everything I can to be happy, and to help others to feel good too. But it was reassuring to be told to be gentle with myself while I'm doing it. To try my best, but not to expect perfection – or anything close.

Going back to work is bound to bring challenges that we haven't even anticipated. None of us knows how we're going to feel, and everyone's emotions will likely be raw for some time to come. So there's no point piling even more pressure on ourselves – and I've made a very clear mental note about self-compassion. That was something that came up in Rachel's chats with other top academics and authors such as Srikumar Rao, Tal Ben-Shahar, and Robert Kaplan, too.

Learning From the Experts

Mind Tools Expert Voices is our latest resource – a podcast that gathers ideas and insights from a range of renowned guests from our Expert Interviews series.

Expert Voices allows us to hear their thoughts on one particular theme. In the first episode, "How to Be Happy in the New Normal," we hear advice on creating a positive mindset, useful relaxation techniques, and methods for generating happiness even in the most trying circumstances.

If – like me – you've got complicated feelings about the next phase, and you're looking for ways to face it with more confidence, why not take time to hear what the experts have to say?

Listen to the First Episode of Mind Tools Expert Voices

Mind Tools Club Members and Corporate Licensees can listen to the full Expert Voices podcast now.

If you’re not a Mind Tools member, you can join the Mind Tools Club and gain access to our 2,400+ resources, including a range of audio features. For corporate licensing, ask for a demo with one of our team. 

How are you feeling about life after lockdown? Has the pandemic taken its toll on your positivity and passion? Share your experiences and tips in the comments section, below.

The post Will I Be Happy in the New Normal? - Mind Tools Expert Voices appeared first on Mind Tools.

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