This is a standard example of my life: finding mundane, everyday tasks difficult. Going to the opticians, for most, is a test of your eyesight. But, for me, it's a test of my brain. I struggle to tell the difference between some letters because I’m dyslexic – and now the owner of an unnecessary pair of glasses.

What Is Dyslexia?

Dyslexia was first named by German ophthalmologist Professor Rudolf Berlin in the 18th century. It's a condition that's hereditary and often random. We don’t yet fully understand the cause of the condition, but its effects can be broad and diverse.

There isn’t a fixed definition of dyslexia, and you'll get a different answer depending on the resource you consult. My favourite definition is the one from The Rose Report:

“Dyslexia is a learning difficulty that primarily affects the skills involved in accurate and fluent word reading and spelling. Characteristic features of dyslexia are difficulties in phonological awareness, verbal memory and verbal processing speed. Dyslexia occurs across the range of intellectual abilities. It is best thought of as a continuum, not a distinct category... Co-occurring difficulties may be seen in aspects of language, motor co-ordination, mental calculation, concentration and personal organisation, but these are not, by themselves, markers of dyslexia.”

I especially like this definition because it makes the point that the key components of dyslexia are words – spoken and written – while a caravan of bonus symptoms tag along, like coordination, mathematics and concentration.

For my part, I struggle with reading, writing, and especially short-term memory. Dates and figures disappear from my mind as quickly as the breeze passes over my forehead. One of my best friends suffers from dyslexia, too, and he is constantly falling over due to poor motor coordination. Whereas I can happily walk a high ropes course without peril.

Dyslexia is diverse, and the familiar trope of, “Well, I can’t spell so I’m dyslexic,” is reductive and unhelpful. Each person with dyslexia suffers a range of symptoms, which can change over time.

Discovering My Dyslexia

When I was in Year 1 at school, we weren’t allowed to go for lunch until we'd put our books away in little trays with our names on them. One of my earliest memories is of sitting and crying while the teacher willed me on to find my name. I couldn’t find my name because I couldn’t read my name.

I remember being set homework and my dad getting frustrated because I couldn’t complete it. It wasn’t until I moved schools in Year 4 that things changed. I met the wonderful Mr Bush and he immediately realised I had dyslexia. As soon as the penny dropped, I was put into specific classes and offered specialist help. My reading and writing quickly improved, and my dad came up with an ingenious way to make me practice reading: half an hour of reading meant half an hour of Gran Turismo 4 on the PlayStation.

But as my reading and writing improved, so did my self-awareness. I realised that dyslexia was going to be a real problem and something that might potentially hold me back in the workplace.

Keeping It a Secret

Dyslexia is conspicuous in its notoriety; everyone thinks they understand it, while most have little grasp of what it is or what it means for the individual with it. But because everyone has heard of it, peers think they’re qualified to give advice.

As I entered the workplace, I was warned not to bring it up. When I went for my first interview, I was told by a peer who meant well, “Don’t mention you have dyslexia. If it gets down to the final selection, and you’re both equally qualified and experienced, they’re going to pick the other person as they’ll be less of an inconvenience.”

At the time, this seemed like sensible advice (and advice I adhered to). It was only much later on that I realized that hiding your condition and being ashamed of it is not positive, not progress, and not helpful to anyone. I carried this shame with me for many years. I spent a long time trying my best to hide my condition, laughing off the spelling mistakes and the figures I kept forgetting. It took a long time to get over that shame.

Dyslexia at Work

Hiding a core aspect of yourself is tiring. Pretending you can disguise your struggles with something as fundamental as reading and writing can only go on so long, especially in a workplace where you do a lot of reading and writing.

I think Teams and Slack strike fear into a lot of dyslexics. Now, not only will your team see your writing, but the entire company can critique your grasp of "though, thought, tough, through, and thorough."

At some point in my career, I decided I wanted to make a change. I didn't want to hide my dyslexia anymore. And the stars aligned in several key areas:

1. I had matured as a person and in my seniority, so I was less afraid.
2. I had a boss I trusted and who supported my personal development.
3. Mind Tools (where I work) asked for anyone with a learning disability to come forward to contribute toward a project.

I offered myself to Mind Tools, and before I knew it I was speaking on webinars, writing blogs, featuring in videos, and being interviewed. I had the opportunity to talk and for people to listen.

How Can Managers Support Dyslexic Employees?

A common question I received was, “What can managers do to support dyslexics?” Here's my answer.

Foster a Supportive Environment

The most important thing anyone can do is to help foster a supportive environment. If you create the right company culture, your employees will feel empowered to come to you with what they need. And that goes far beyond dyslexia.

Talk to Your Team

If you’re aware you have dyslexic individuals in your team, talk to them about what they need. Do they feel excluded from team workshops that involve a lot of writing? Are they struggling with the dreaded “timed Miro board”? If so, how can you modify these activities to be more inclusive? Ask them what they need – they'll know best.

Use Technology

We’re currently blessed with some astounding AI tools, from autocorrects that actually work to incredibly accurate transcription tools. Think about how you can leverage these tools to support your team. And make it clear where these tools are available – they shouldn't be something employees need to ask for.

I've recently stopped writing instructions for tasks. Now I use free screen-recording software (the Screencastify Chrome browser plugin) to record myself doing the task while narrating my actions. It's been a game changer.

Conduct a Review of Tasks and Responsibilities

Can roles be shifted around? Or can tasks that were traditionally written instead be recorded, like I now do? Take this as an opportunity to review your legacy tasks and harness the opportunity to renew and improve.

All these changes will not only make your team members more efficient and productive, they will also be happier. Morale is infectious, and it will spread across the team. It'll be a more energized team, working even better together. And when everyone can perform at their best, they’re going to race through the team bonding stages of forming, storming, norming, and performing.

“The World Is Not a Wish-Granting Factory”

The author John Green wrote, “The world is not a wish-granting factory.” I’m not going to wake up tomorrow and be cured. I will always have dyslexia and there's nothing I can do about it. But there is something that you can do about it.

You can make the workplace more inclusive, make the world less judgmental and open, and support equal opportunities for all. When this happens, we all benefit. My one wish you have the power to grant is that you level the playing field as best you can.

I'll still own a pair of glasses that I don’t need and get frustrated trying to reason with an inanimate parking meter, but I’ll be happier doing it. And wouldn’t that be nice?

Useful Resources on Dyslexia in the Workplace

For more information and useful tips, try these Mind Tools resources. (Some of these will only be available to Mind Tools members.)

Dyslexia in the Workplace (Article)
Neurodiversity in the Workplace (Article)
Diversity at Work (Animated Video)
Autism in the Workplace (Article)
ADHD in the Workplace (Article)
Improving Group Dynamics (Article)
Training Needs Assessment (Article)

About the Author:

Jaye is an experienced Customer Service Manager. After studying motorsport engineering at university, he went into a career centred on problem-solving and helping people, jumping from engineering to customer support. Jaye joined Mind Tools in 2016 and has worked in several roles, always focusing on a customer-first mentality. A published poet and keen hiker, in his spare time Jaye enjoys mountain climbing.

The post Dyslexia at Work: How I Learned to Live With My Dyslexia appeared first on Mind Tools.

In one place I worked, there was a guy called Nick. Nick is his real name. I doubt anyone will recognize him from my description now, and why should I spare his blushes? Anyway, Nick was a knowledgeable guy. As the product of an expensive education, he should have been. And he knew it.

None of which would be a problem, except that Nick didn't wear his knowledge lightly. In meetings, he'd correct people, interrupt for "clarification," and dispute petty points. He'd also just talk over people, including me. And my reaction was not me at my best. I neither confronted him, nor rose above him. I just sat there in a passive-aggressive huff.

Recognizing Triggers

I'd been triggered. Triggers are actions that provoke a negative emotional response. That response might be anger, resignation or fear, to name but three. We're perhaps used to hearing about triggers in connection with racist or sexist microaggression. But triggers are everywhere, and they're often delivered unintentionally. They can still do huge harm.

Sally Helgesen's book "Rising Together" is largely devoted to a study of triggers, and how to overcome them – so that everyone in an organization can be heard, can be valued, and can thrive. And some of her observations are surprising.

Reframing Your Thinking

Can you be too authentic, for example? Surely not. Projecting authenticity is a vital skill in building trust, particularly for managers. But what if your determination to be true to yourself damages your relationships with others, and marks you out as inflexible? Maybe that's too authentic.

That's not to say that we should just sit back and accept overt bad behavior. But it's worth thinking about what else you can do when you're triggered, other than sit there with steam coming out of your ears.

Maybe you could reframe what you're experiencing. In my case, perhaps Nick was actually a decent guy whose anxiety to make a good impression made him overkeen, for example. I could have met him halfway, perhaps supporting some of his points while quietly making a few of my own.

Insincere? Perhaps, a little. But also, it would have been more effective in establishing my own right to speak. And that's good old assertiveness. I'm already feeling calmer and more in control, albeit 20 years too late.

Confidence Isn't Everything

If that's a fresh take on authenticity, then wait until you hear what Helgesen has to say about confidence. Recruiters love confidence. They want executives who can deliver a vision and carry a room. Never mind whether they actually understand the market they're in.

But news just in: in winning people over, confidence is actually far less important than boring old competence. Take the new Ford CEO who freely admitted that he didn't know much about the car industry. You can imagine a room full of car industry execs inhaling sharply together. How could he get away with saying such a thing?

Well, by pointing out that everyone else in the room had that knowledge, and that he was prepared to work as hard as required to acquire it. Which he did.

Admitting his lack of knowledge became a strength, not a weakness.

Triggers Build Barriers, We Need to Pull Them Down

The main point of "Rising Together" is about inclusivity. Most of us want to belong to organizations that encourage a culture of belonging. We want everyone to be valued and heard. And we want to be able to communicate freely.

Triggers help to build barriers between people. To overcome them, we need to admit our own failings and be a little more understanding of the failings of others. It can be a tough ask. It can require us to examine quite a lot of what we thought we knew. But the rewards, as Helgesen lays them out, are worth the effort many times over.

Listen to Our "Rising Together" Book Insight

We review the best new business books and the tested classics in our monthly Book Insights, available as text or as 15-minute audio recordings.

So, if you're a Mind Tools Club member or corporate user, listen to the "Rising Together" Book Insight now!

If you haven't already signed up, join the Mind Tools Club and gain access to our 2,400+ resources, including 390+ Book Insights. For corporate licensing, ask for a demo with one of our team.

About the Author:

Simon has been researching, writing and editing non-fiction for over 30 years. In that time he's worked on educational courses, scientific journals, and mass-market trade books about everything from popular psychology to buying houses in Bulgaria. In the last 20 years he's specialized in simplifying complex subjects, and helping readers to learn new skills. Away from work he listens to good music, watches bad football, and is fascinated by medieval history.

The post Triggers: How to Stop Rising to the Bait appeared first on Mind Tools.

June marks Pride Month for the U.K., U.S. and Australia. And yet, despite progress and increased public support for LGBTQ+ equality in recent times, many people who belong to the community are still discriminated against, in the workplace and outside of it.

In fact, according to data collected by the Human Rights Campaign Foundation, 46 percent of people are still closeted at work. Some of the main reasons for this are fear of being stereotyped (38 percent), worries over making others feel uncomfortable (36 percent), and concerns about losing friends (31 percent).

In many territories across the world, being or behaving in a way that implies you're LGBTQ+ can still have severe consequences. In fact, 71 countries still criminalize same-sex relationships, with eight countries even using the death penalty as a punishment. And in more than half of the world, LGBTQ+ people are not protected from discrimination by workplace law.

LGBTQ+ Equality and the Workplace

One of the few spaces that can have real impact in improving LGBTQ+ equality is the workplace. And unsurprisingly, being an LGBTQ+ inclusive employer is great for business too. It "positively impacts recruitment, retention, engagement and, overall, total revenue" according to the Human Rights Campaign Foundation. But it takes effort – and it's not only up to LGBTQ+ colleagues to change the workplace culture. It's up to the rest of us, too.

Often – far too often – we tend to tell ourselves, "What can I do?" or, "It's none of my business." We might think we're too ignorant or out of the loop to really understand the things that impact our LGBTQ+ colleagues. We might be worried that we'll make a mistake and cause offense, without intending to. We might even think that the war for equality has been won, now that same-sex marriage is legal (in some territories), and other rights activists are openly doing more to achieve equality in legislation.

But allies to the community are key to long-term transformation. This is particularly the case in workplaces, where co-workers and supervisors can use their influence to change mindsets, call out negative stereotyping and discrimination, and celebrate the uniqueness and diversity of colleagues.

Being an Ally to LGBTQ+ Colleagues

You don't have to be a member of the LGBTQ+ community to support it. It's not even difficult to do. It takes respect, and the ability to listen (properly listen without interrupting) and learn.

So, if you want to show your support but aren't sure how to do it, here are a few things you can do to become a true ally to your LGBTQ+ colleagues:

1. Learn About LGBTQ+ Life

Pride Month is a great opportunity to learn! So why not take some time to discover the story behind how Pride started? Or learn more about some of the key figures who changed the course of LGBTQ+ history?

Brush up on terms, too. We use the term LGBTQ+ frequently, but do you actually know what it stands for? LGBTQ+ is an initialism for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, and Queer, while the "plus" includes other sexualities and identities, such as pansexual, intersex and asexual. While the term is relatively new, remember that LGBTQ+ people have always existed – from way before this term became popular!

Over the years, Pride has become much more diverse to encompass many different sexualities and identities, some of which are still not fully understood. This can at times feel confusing (there's a lot to learn!). To help out, we've produced a handy infographic that includes some of the different Pride flags and what they represent:

It's also important to remember that the LGBTQ+ community itself differs in opinions and beliefs, sometimes widely and strongly. Be open and respectful to these varied opinions. As long as they're not hurtful or abusive, they can tell you a lot about the unique perspectives of the LGBTQ+ community and the issues facing it.

2. Avoid Assumptions

Unless a colleague specifically mentions their sexual orientation, it's unprofessional and inconsiderate to make assumptions. After all, you may be wrong. There's no way of knowing whether someone is LGBTQ+ without asking them. Assuming that you have "gaydar" can actually perpetuate harmful stereotypes.

Even if you know that one of your colleagues is LGBTQ+, it's important to let them decide if and when they want to let others know. They may be very private. Keep in mind that they need to make this decision repeatedly – whenever they start a new job or meet new people.

Avoid putting your LGBTQ+ colleagues in the uncomfortable position of speaking for the whole group. Just because your colleague is transgender doesn't mean that they want to talk about transgender issues all the time, or that they're some kind of spokesperson for the transgender community.

3. Use Inclusive Language

Use language that recognizes that people have diverse lifestyles, relationships and families. For example, instead of asking about someone's "husband" or "wife," you could ask about their "partner." Or instead of "mom" and "dad," say "parent."

If you still aren't sure what terms you should be using, ask! This is a sign of respect and an easy way to demonstrate your support for LGBTQ+ colleagues.

No matter how well-intentioned you are, chances are you've used gendered words in the workplace. But using non-inclusive words regularly can have a negative impact on people who already feel that they don't fit in to what's perceived to be the "norm."

Just think about the following phrases:

• guys and gals.
• ladies and gentlemen.
• brothers and sisters.
• sir/madam.
• he/she.

The above are gender assumptive. They only recognize two main genders, but the truth is that some people don't belong to either. They might be gender fluid or non-binary. So try using more inclusive language instead, such as:

• friends and colleagues.
• esteemed guests.
• they/them.
• everyone.

4. Be Respectful of Pronouns

The pronouns that we use (he or she or they) are tied intrinsically to our identity. So it's important that we get these right – particularly when it comes to our colleagues.

Some people may be trans; others may be gender neutral. And yet, far too often people assume pronouns for other people. Often this is reflexive, but getting it wrong can cause people upset (even if it's unintentional). So, if you're unsure, ask someone, "What's your personal pronoun?" This is an open, low-pressure question that allows someone who's in the process of transitioning or has already transitioned to affirm their identity.

You can also do your bit by updating your own pronouns in visible spaces – for example, on social media profiles, or on internal communication platforms, via your IM profile and email signature. Doing this supports trans and non-binary people by normalizing gender identity and expression.

5. Tackle Discrimination and Harassment

Intolerance in the workplace can take the form of overt abuse or microaggressions. Obviously, overt abuse and harassment have no place in the workplace, and a zero-tolerance approach should be taken.

Pinpointing and dealing with microaggressions can be more tricky. According to professor of psychology Dr Kevin L. Nadal, microaggressions are "commonplace verbal, behavioral, or environmental actions that communicate hostility toward oppressed or targeted groups."

They might seem like small things; but, over time, they can have a serious impact on a person's physical and mental wellbeing. Furthermore, ignoring them can serve to perpetuate inequality and undermine inclusion.

Common examples of microaggressions are things like, "You don't look gay," or, "How did you turn gay?" They can also include misgendering, tokenization, failure to acknowledge LGBTQ+ relationships, or exclusion from social groups.

When perpetrators are called out on their behavior, they might qualify it with things like, "You're being oversensitive," or, "I was just joking." This can make it tricky to tackle this kind of behavior. Dr Nadal suggests victims or witnesses ask themselves five questions to help them decide how to respond:

• If I respond, could my physical safety be in danger?
• If I respond, will the person become defensive, and will this lead to an argument?
• If I respond, how will this affect my relationship with this person?
• If I don't respond, will I regret not saying something?
• If I don't respond, does that convey that I accept the behavior or statement?

If you do decide to take action, respond assertively rather than aggressively. Calmly talk to the person about how their words and behavior have affected you. Use "I" statements such as, "I think what you just said was very hurtful," instead of attacking statements like, "You're homophobic," which will likely cause the person to become defensive.

Finally, seek support! If you feel that microaggressions are constant and persistent, even when you've done your best to address them, you may need to make a formal complaint to HR. Also, talk to your allies – people who you know to be trustworthy and who will listen to you without judgment. Share with them the emotional impact of the situation and how it's affected you. This can be crucial in allowing you to work through negative feelings that the microaggression has caused, such as low self-confidence or self-worth, anger, and even depression.

Do you know of more ways we can support our LGBTQ+ co-workers? What do you expect from a good ally? You might be interested in the following resources:

Diversity at Work Video
Mutual Respect
Toxic: A Guide to Rebuilding Respect and Tolerance in a Hostile Workplace
The Diversity Bonus: How Great Teams Pay Off in the Knowledge Economy
Understanding the Bystander Effect

About the Author:

Lucy has over 10 years’ experience writing, editing and commissioning content. She has a keen interest in supporting inclusion and diversity, and chairs Mind Tools' neurodiversity panel. Lucy also heads up Mind Tools’ video learning series, and particularly enjoys exploring and experimenting with new video formats. When she’s not producing fantastic new learning content, she can be found enjoying nature with her two kids and delving into the latest book on her very long reading list!

The post 5 Ways to Support Your LGBTQ+ Colleagues appeared first on Mind Tools.

Mental health issues make people feel uncomfortable. I'm not talking about people who suffer from them – I mean the people who don't. When you don't have any personal experience of poor mental health, it can be – excuse the pun – difficult to get your head around.

If you meet a friend or co-worker hobbling along on crutches, you can immediately sympathize and empathize. You notice and process the clues easily, because you recognize what you see, and understand its likely consequences. And it's possible that you've suffered a similar injury yourself in the past, and almost literally "feel their pain."

But the clues that someone has a mental health issue can be far more difficult to identify and react to.

Chances are, someone with such a condition is doing their best to hide it. They'll forego the opportunity to receive any of that same sympathy and empathy because it's risky. Having anything less than 100 percent good mental health holds a stigma. So it can be tricky to know what to say if someone does confide in you, or if you find out some other way.

Mental Health Is a Battle on Two Fronts

Social awkwardness is unfortunate, but the shame and fear it can lead to can create lasting damage.

People can be extremely reluctant to reveal their mental struggles because of the potential impact on their careers and relationships. And so they fight on two fronts – managing the condition itself and trying to present a "normal" façade to the rest of the world.

I described my own, mercifully short, battle with post-traumatic stress after a serious motorcycle accident in this Mind Tools blog. I still recall the fear I had of talking to anyone – family, friend or work colleague – about that consequence of the crash.

The isolation and sense of worthlessness that many people experience as a result of mental health issues can be devastating, as highlighted by the World Health Organization. The 2022 WHO report reveals that even when help is available, it's not taken up. The authors said, "People will often choose to suffer mental distress without relief rather than risk the discrimination and ostracization that comes with accessing mental health services."

Wellbeing in the Workplace

I like to think that, as individuals, we can overcome our initial awkwardness and confusion at learning that a colleague is facing a health challenge, and that we will be supportive and accepting. After all, isn't this what we need ourselves whenever we're having a tough time?

But can organizations do more to help us all to succeed and thrive at work?

Managers have to balance their responsibilities to their team members and to their organization. And, when it comes to health, these responsibilities need not conflict.

A workplace that's safe, both physically and mentally, and that enables its people to look after themselves and one another, will likely suffer less absenteeism and presenteeism. It will support more honest conversations, and engender more loyalty and trust. And all of these attributes can surely only help the bottom line.

This Mind Tools video explores six ways that organizations, leaders, and managers can support their people's mental health.

Points to Ponder: What Are Your Experiences of Mental Health at Work?

If you've managed someone facing a mental health issue, what strategies did you use? And if you've ever discussed your own mental health with your manager or co-workers, what reaction did you get? What approach does your organization take to mental health, and why?

If you would like to explore Mind Tools resources on mental health, here's a list for further reading:

Personal Financial Stress and Wellbeing
Hurry Sickness
How to Deal With Anxiety
Managing Stress
Managing Post-Traumatic Growth

About the Author:

Keith is a managing editor at Mind Tools and has been part of the content team since 2015. He's an experienced editor, writer and manager, with a long history of working in the e-learning and media industries.

The post Mental Health – Let's Get Our Heads Around It appeared first on Mind Tools.

Our next-door neighbors on one side were elderly, and on the other side were slightly younger than my parents, and they had children our age. Opposite was Mrs Williamson (who always dressed up even though she lived alone) and her toy pom dog (who drank tea from a Royal Doulton cup). One house down lived another couple with children. (We were in different schools because they were English and I was Afrikaans, but we loved playing together during school holidays.)

Our relationship with the older couple was always very comfortable and warm. We were "sugar neighbors" – the kind who would lend each other a cup of sugar. And we also had keys to one another's houses. Believe me, I would have been locked out of the house after school very often if not! I always found their house to be a comforting and safe place.

Intergenerational Workplaces... or the Lack Of

When I started working, I was in the banking industry in a highly intergenerational department.

On one end of the spectrum was Mrs S (as we called her) who was close to retiring. On the other end was none other than yours truly – at the tender age of 21. Thinking back now, I know I didn't realize or appreciate how fortunate I was to have colleagues of all ages.

However, a few years later I started working at a company where only two people (the CEO and the financial director) were over 40. The rest of us were younger, and most were below 30. There was never a lack of creativity and ideas (or mischief). But what we did lack was a sense of calm, and the wisdom that comes as a result of life lessons. As well as the ability to ask penetrative questions based on wide-ranging experience. 

The Benefits of an Intergenerational Team

While writing this blog, I asked my bonus son (my stepson) how he thinks intergenerational workplaces benefit team members.

He works for a young company that provides technical and IT services. The company was founded by a person who was 50 at the time. All the technicians are in their twenties, the accounting and admin staff are in their thirties and forties. However, the one position that George (the founder) struggled to fill, was that of a technical and maintenance manager. He searched high and low, but couldn't find a person that he thought was a good fit.

One day, George started talking with a stranger in a store. The other man, Jordy, was a retiree who had been out of the workplace for 10 years, but he'd worked in power plants and other technical environments all his life. George had a gut feeling that Jordy was the right person for the position. So he asked him if he'd consider returning to work. As it turned out, Jordy hated not working. It made him feel unwanted and discarded. He was yearning to contribute to society by sharing his knowledge and experience.

Jordy's knowledge was immense. He knew exactly how to troubleshoot technical issues that would have kept the younger members of the team perplexed for days. But, he was still quite "old school" in his approach and often offended or annoyed co-workers because he spoke his mind openly, and didn't really take their boundaries into consideration. Political correctness wasn't part of his vocabulary!

So, while Jordy was imparting valuable knowledge to his team members, they taught him how to navigate the modern workplace.

"It didn't end there," our son said. "Jordy also taught us to be patient with him in a different way than he had to be patient with us. Both sides learned lessons from the interactions with one another – and it taught us all that there's always more to consider than meets the eye."

What Is Global Intergenerational Week?

You might have seen from our social media channels that we've been busy celebrating Global Intergenerational Week over the past few days, during which we got involved in conversations about intergenerational working and the benefits of age diversity.

When we talk about the various generations, there are three key things that tend to inform the main differences in the way each thinks:

1. How they were parented.
2. Technological advances and how they changed their world.
3. Major economic events that impacted them.

Given my formative years and background, I've always been appreciative of intergenerational working because I believe people of all ages add value in different ways. I've also learned these lessons:

• Avoid generalizing. An older person might be just as happy to use modern technology and digital devices as millennials. In fact, my 83-year-old mother loves Facebook and my friend's daughter doesn't even have a Facebook account!
• Being older doesn't necessarily mean being wiser. And, conversely, not all younger people are unwise! Learn to listen and appreciate people for who they are, not for the box in which you think they belong.
• Don't talk over people as if they don't exist. This goes for both young and old people. It's offensive, regardless of age.
• Be respectful. Recognize people's agency and respect it!

Relevant Resources

If you want to learn more about intergenerational working, check out the following selection of Mind Tools resources (note that you will need to be a Mind Tools Club or Corporate member to see all of the resources in full):

How to Thrive in a Multi-Generational Workplace
Stage (Not Age)

About the Author

Yolandé uses her 20+ years of experience as a therapist, coach, facilitator, and business school lecturer to help people develop their careers and live up to their potential. She thrives on facilitating conversations designed to build bridges between people by using creative questioning and thinking techniques.

You might mistake her for a city girl, but Yolandé is an honorary game ranger, loves birding, archaeology, and spending time in the African bush. Early morning runs with her rottweiler and reading (a lot) are her favorite activities. And, her neighbors will tell you that she loves the kitchen and it gives her joy to "bake" people happy. 

The post Global Intergenerational Week 2023 appeared first on Mind Tools.

For over a century, women have been striving for equality. To be appreciated for their difference, given the same freedoms and opportunities to contribute and thrive as their male counterparts, and to receive equal pay. Women's suffrage resulted in some women receiving the vote, but that hasn't translated into equality in all areas of life and work.

There's no doubt that progress has been made. Fifty years ago, a woman couldn't wear trousers in the workplace or access birth control. And if she fell pregnant, she had no legal protection from being fired.

Yet progress is slow, and the COVID-19 pandemic set things back for women. Women have always had the double bind of caring and domestic tasks. And, during the pandemic, responsibilities such as homeschooling and elder care disproportionately fell to women. In the same period, layoffs most negatively impacted women-dominated professions. Flexible-working arrangements and work-from-anywhere policies have allowed many women to juggle work with care responsibilities.

But now women have to compete with proximity bias as a result. Because they're not physically present, more women than men are seen as less ambitious, and aren't being considered for career-enhancing opportunities. On top of setbacks like the Roe Vs. Wade overturn, it's easy to see why so many women are feeling disheartened with modern equality progress.

Moving Beyond Equality

In our evolving thinking over the last decade, we've realized that we need to move beyond gender equality – where men and women are treated the same. Instead, we must seek equity, which focuses on giving extra support to those who need it to achieve equal outcomes. This is the exact thinking behind the theme for this year's International Women's Day: "Embrace Equity."

There is much we can learn from racial equity and how it has sought to give a helping hand to those from the global majority. (People who are Black, Asian, Brown, dual heritage, indigenous to the global south, and/or have been racialized as "ethnic minorities.") This is achieved by noticing systems that disadvantage people, and by seeking to overcome them. To do so we need to take an individual approach, to lead, share power, and focus on outcomes.

Forward-thinking organizations create flexible-working arrangements for all staff, including those in senior roles, so that carers who work part-time aren't penalized. This way, all can benefit. Representation of women at the top of most organizations is low, but those dedicated to moving the dial on gender balance will have a sponsorship program, formalizing a relationship where a senior leader actively advocates for female talent, opens doors, and "wears her t-shirt." This has been proven to make a positive difference in combating affinity bias, where leaders endorse those in their own image.

Why Is Intersectionality Important?

Some organizations may think the work is done when it comes to gender equality. However, the progress is often unstable, with one or two women recruited into senior roles, and no sustainable pipeline of future talent being nurtured. Or sometimes women are well represented at senior level, but they all come from similar backgrounds. They don't represent all women.

The pioneering scholar and writer Kimberlé Crenshaw describes the need for an intersectional lens so that we see the way various forms of inequality often operate together and exacerbate each other. We tend to talk about gender inequality as separate from inequality based on race, class, sexuality, or immigrant status, but they intersect. Gender-equality initiatives may not take into account the challenges of women due to their ethnic backgrounds, such as accent or cultural discrimination, and stereotypes like being called angry or timid. Crenshaw describes the compound effect of ethnicity and gender as equaling more than the characteristics on their own.

Looking at the intersections can help us to understand where women are falling through the cracks. This includes the experience of Black women, women who identify as having a disability, or those from the LGBTQ+ community. For example, according to ONS data in 2021, the median pay for disabled women was 10.5 percent less than for non-disabled women. Other research has found that older female workers are more likely to remain in a low pay bracket than men. And over half of Black women report never having had an informal conversation with a senior leader at their company, thereby missing out on the opportunity to develop a relationship and receive sponsorship.

Final Thoughts on Gender Equity

Removing the barriers to success for women helps everyone. The more that we explore racial equity and its intersections with gender, the closer we can get to creating gender equality for all women. The goal isn't to just eliminate the gap between white women and women from the global majority, but to increase the success of all groups. Systems that are failing women and failing those from the global majority are actually failing everyone.

Instead of competing in the "Oppression Olympics" and arguing about which groups are more ill-treated, we can aim to understand the solutions that can create a fairer society.

In fact, what if we could hold the view that for everyone to win, no one had to lose? It might radically change things.

What can your workplace do to create fairer opportunities for staff? How does it already support its female workers? You may be interested in the related resources:

Our Separate Ways: Black and White Women and the Struggle for Professional Identity

Unleashed: The Unapologetic Leader's Guide to Empowering Everyone Around You

Bias Interrupted and The End of Bias

Striking the Right Gender Balance Infographic

Jenny Garrett OBE is an executive coach, leadership trainer, and diversity, equity and inclusion expert. Her latest book is "Equality vs Equity: Tackling Issues of Race in the Workplace."

The post Gender Equality Vs. Equity – What's the Difference? appeared first on Mind Tools.

Only the other day I was on a busy train, with very few spare seats. One couple had a surprising amount of space, occupying a table for four, with their bags spread around them. I watched as passenger after passenger walked past that table, their eyes flicking away, rather than asking the pair to move their things.

And, this time, I wondered if it had anything to do with the fact that the man had dwarfism. Could this really be why no one sat with them?

Disability in an Ableist World

Some ableism is systemic, like a lack of accessible infrastructure in schools, offices and transportation hubs. It can also be internalized.

We may talk over a neurodivergent colleague, mistaking a pause for the end of her point. Or avoid someone who looks different on a train, as I witnessed.

According to Ladau, this is about our perception of disability and disabled people – sometimes as superhuman, more commonly as subhuman. But we can change that.

Here’s what she told me, in our interview. (You can stream the audio clip below or download a transcript here.)

To explore these ideas, I’d recommend reading Emily Ladau’s book, "Demystifying Disability: What to Know, What to Say, and How to be an Ally." It’s a clear, nonjudgmental guide to helping make the world a more accessible and inclusive place.

The idea of "allyship" is central to this goal, but what does that really mean?

How (Not) to Be a Disability Ally

"We can very easily fall into the trap of looking at it as a title that we give ourselves," Ladau notes. "But… it’s really about taking meaningful action."

In fact, she suggests that we think of the word "ally" as a verb, not a noun, because it’s about doing things, not just talking about it. We should actively educate ourselves, with an open mind, and learn about experiences beyond our own.

Part of that is recognizing that every disabled person is an individual, with a host of different characteristics and support needs. Or, in Ladau’s words, "If you’ve met one disabled person, you’ve met one disabled person."

It's Not About You

If we don’t focus on the individual, we can make all sorts of wrong assumptions that can end up causing problems. We might think we’re being an ally by steering a blind person across a road, or pushing someone’s wheelchair up a slope. But if we’d just asked that person, we might have discovered they didn’t want that. And they may have needed something else. 

So the action allies take must be collaborative, not well-meaning gestures they impose on a person or group. As Ladau points out, doing something for disabled people and working with them are two very different things.  

"In one, you are essentially erasing the very person who you’re claiming to advocate for, whereas when you’re doing things side by side, what you’re doing is you’re amplifying the perspective of the person who you’re trying to be an ally to. And I think it’s essential to recognize that difference."

It’s a mindset shift that can only happen through open conversation. 

Disability Inclusion or Exclusion?

As someone who "navigates the world on wheels," as she puts it, Ladau has had a lifetime of dealing with ableism. I’m still thinking about a particular example from her book – it encapsulates a lot of the issues she’s working to change...

When Ladau was at college, a resident assistant in her dorm was running a disability awareness event. Did this person invite Ladau along to talk with participants about her life on wheels? No. Instead, they asked to borrow Ladau’s wheelchair, so that participants could use it to go around an obstacle course they’d set up in the lounge. 

What was Ladau supposed to do while her expensive mobility equipment – her only means of getting about – was being used like a toy? She declined the request, saddened by this missed opportunity to engage with and educate nondisabled people about her experiences, herself. 

“I remember feeling like less of a person in that moment,” Ladau writes.

Ableism makes people feel like that, as well as causing numerous practical and logistical problems for disabled people as they go about their day-to-day lives. Allies can help change that, person by person, moment by moment. 

Beyond the Infrastructure 

In the workplace, managers can be allies by “creating an environment where people feel safe and welcome to show up as their whole selves at work and to be open about their disability experiences... giving people the space to speak up for what they need to thrive.”

But Ladau concludes, "I want people to understand that allyship is very much a journey and not a destination. 

"You can listen to a podcast episode, you can read an article, you can watch a documentary, you can attend a webinar or have a conversation with a disabled person. But that doesn’t mean that you stop there.  

"My best advice is to keep learning, to keep going, to seek out new resources and new ways to learn and new ways to engage."

The Full Story

You can listen to my full 30-minute interview with Emily Ladau if you're a Mind Tools Club member, or a Mind Tools for Business licensee. You'll hear about her time on iconic children's TV show "Sesame Street" and how being disabled cuts across all other identities. As ever, the audio comes with a full transcript.

If you're not already signed up, join the Mind Tools Club now to gain unlimited access to 2,400+ resources, including our back catalog of 200+ Expert Interviews. Or find out more about Mind Tools for whole organizations, big or small, by contacting our enterprise team.

Meanwhile, catch more excerpts and insights from my guests by searching the Expert Interview blog topic and by signing up to the new Mind Tools Expert Voices podcast.

The post "I'm Not More or Less: I Just Am" – Emily Ladau on Disability appeared first on Mind Tools.

They communicated in French, the dominant language at our dinner table. This allowed me to learn a third language. While I spoke Italian to my father and Greek to my mother, I spoke French to myself and majored in French at university.

Speaking a second language raises our cultural awareness, and helps broaden our horizons beyond the confines of our native language. The second language is akin to giving us a second identity, an identity as a multicultural individual with numerous personal and professional advantages. Perhaps this is what Holy Roman emperor Charlemagne meant when he said, "To have another language is to possess a second soul."

What Does It Mean to Be a Multicultural Individual? 

But being multicultural can cause identity issues and confusion about who we are. Does being multicultural mean coming from an immigrant family (like Arab-Americans, British Indians, or Chinese Canadians?) Or, do we acquire a multicultural identity from learning to speak more than one language, or from living or working abroad?

One of the best definitions of a multicultural individual comes from a recent Harvard Business Review article, "What Makes You Multicultural." Based on the authors' research, they define multiculturalism within individuals as "the degree to which they know, identify with, and internalize more than one culture."

So, being multicultural is about more than just attending a language course. Being multicultural involves taking an interest in another culture's way of thinking and behaving, so that you understand it almost as well as your own culture. 

Code-Switching

But being multicultural is slightly different for everyone. I don't switch cultural codes by changing my behavior or tone with different groups. But others will embody different cultures depending on who they're with. This is the art of "code-switching."

Traditionally it was defined as seamlessly switching between two or more languages during a single conversation. Today, it's taken on a broader meaning. It often refers to marginalized or underrepresented individuals adapting to the dominant environment around them.

According to racial research in Harvard Business Review, code-switching describes "adjustments in one's style of speech, appearance, behavior, and expression in ways that will optimize the comfort of others in exchange for fair treatment, quality service, and employment opportunities." 

Katrina Bath, a researcher for Emerald Publishing, is British by nationality and Indian by blood and ethnicity. When asked if she code-switches, Katrina replied, "Yes definitely, I really notice the code-switch with my friends and cousins.

"When I'm with my South Asian friends, I notice I become "more Asian" in the way I speak. I mix some Punjabi words into my sentences, and there's a lot more banter. When I'm around my white friends, I'm freer in the topics we discuss as I'm OK with discussing "taboo" and more diverse topics with them." 

What Are the Workplace Benefits of Being Multicultural?

Whether you code-switch or not, there are numerous benefits to being multicultural. Here are just three of the many advantages of multiculturalism in the workplace:

Enhanced Creativity and New Perspectives

Creative people are open to exploring alternatives to how things are done. They can view people, situations and objects from various viewpoints. According to research published in American Psychologist, one way to develop your ability to foster creativity is to immerse yourself in a multicultural experience.

The study shows that people who have spent time assimilating more than one culture are better able to generate creative ideas in the study lab and corporate settings.

Improved Ability to Lead Multicultural Teams

In an increasingly global world, and thanks to technological advancements, geographical boundaries have essentially vanished. These transparent barriers have made more people open to relocating for work. Companies worldwide are hiring foreign workers, leading to an ever-increasing multicultural workforce.

Developing multicultural competence to lead across cultures is vital for leadership success. Recent research published in Organization Science shows that multicultural experiences can improve a leader's communication and leadership skills when managing multinational teams.

Leaders more exposed to diverse cultures are more sensitive to cultural variations. They are, therefore, better able to convey an idea in a framework their followers are more likely to understand and value.

Better Customer Service

Depending on the type and size of the company you work for, chances are you need to serve an international clientele. A central premise of customer service is to put customers at ease, which can be challenging given the various cultures and backgrounds involved.

Multicultural people are generally more accepting and sensitive to other cultures. A multicultural workforce can enhance a company's ability to communicate with customers of different cultures. Ultimately, this means they can provide better customer service to all clients.

For example, in my hometown, North Vancouver, there's a high proportion of Chinese and Persian citizens. It's a known fact that people typically tend to have a greater level of comfort and rapport with those of their own culture. I see many businesses recruit Chinese and native Persian speakers. These employees help companies deal with customers in their native language. 

What I Learned From Being a Multicultural Individual 

Being a multicultural individual has helped me to understand and connect more deeply with people from different parts of the world. Best of all, it's helped me to cultivate cultural empathy, adaptability and patience.

Here's a quick example:

A Middle Eastern man served me once when I visited a phone outlet. He was thorough and competent in responding to my questions about fixing my problem. But I walked away from the encounter feeling uncomfortable and slightly unsettled because he avoided eye contact for 20 minutes. He looked sideways at the desk and behind me. Never once did he look at me while talking to me.

Later, when I recounted the incident to my husband, it reminded me of an essential cultural truth of some Middle Eastern countries that I had forgotten.

I spent most of my early years in the Middle East and studied Arabic in school. Here's one cultural insight I should have remembered – males and females of that region are taught to lower their gaze and avoid sustained eye contact with each other. This practice is a sign of propriety, which can be misinterpreted as rude by anyone unfamiliar with the culture. 

My multiculturalism has given me an appreciation for different cultures. It's helped me to realize that something as simple as eye contact can be a potential source of misunderstanding. 

After decades of living in Canada, I think like a North American while remaining Italian at heart. In multinational groups, when I speak to someone in their native language, I feel an additional sense of belonging, a sense of kinship that accelerates rapport. Sharing a communal language is the shortest bridge between two people.

About the Author:

Bruna is an educator, author and speaker specializing in emotional intelligence, leadership, communication, and presentation-skills training.

The post The Benefits of Being Multicultural appeared first on Mind Tools.

My name is Sonia, I'm the eldest of three siblings. I was born in Washington, D.C., in the U.S. On my birth certificate, my race is recorded as "Negro."

It wasn't until my early elementary school grades that I unofficially learned that Negro evolved into the acceptable term, Black (or African-American). I prefer to identify as a Black American cisgender female business owner.

I didn't grow up in a militant or culturally expressive household, so my race education came from teachers, biographical books, encyclopedias, lectures, television, or my peers.

From elementary school through 11th grade, the final level where social studies courses were a graduation requirement, we were taught a bare-boned version of U.S. Black History.

Teachers usually presented that curriculum segment in February. They taught us what the state department of education wanted us to know.

From Negro History Week to Black History Month

Somewhere along the way, I learned that American historian and educator Dr Carter G. Woodson was responsible for helping implement the first Negro History Week in my country. An eagerness to learn and teach others helped this observance/celebration eventually grow into Black History Month.

There seemed to be a pattern of highlighting the same few notable people from grade to grade each year, although I don't recall questioning this logic while in grade school. My primary focus was learning the information to earn a good grade on the test. 

My earliest memory about "heavy" or detailed Black history was during second or third grade, while watching the Roots miniseries on television. It was based on Alex Haley's groundbreaking 1976 novel, "Roots: The Saga of an American Family."

My parents didn't seem to mind me watching this uncensored presentation, but neither did they offer any guidance or explanations of what I was watching. As a child then, I believe I "received" the overwhelming information, and tried to look for scenes I recognized from television.

Now I Can Find My History

Although my social studies classes through grade 8 mentioned slavery, the lessons never went into such vivid detail as I saw in Roots.

In college, I gained more critical thinking skills and life experiences to enable me to digest this nonfiction work better. I have, however, been compartmentalizing my anger until I can productively communicate or shed it. 

I was impressed with the author's good fortune to trace his genealogy back so many decades to an origin in Africa and to portray it so visually and powerfully. This was "his story," and it let me know that I could find my history when I started that journey, especially with the help of DNA tracing technology. (My + History = Mystery?)

As a freshman at the University of Maryland (College Park), I remember seeing courageous students demonstrating against apartheid. They built and slept in "shantytown" tents on the large grassy plaza of the main library. I became an active leader in numerous student organizations, including Sigma Gamma Rho Sorority, Inc. – an internationally recognized historically Black sorority.

I also worked on- and off-campus part-time jobs. My specific work department didn't sponsor or host Black History Month (BHM) programs, but there were plenty of campus events to choose from, thanks to sponsors and hosts such as the Office of Multi-Ethnic Student Education, African American Studies Dept., Nyumburu Cultural Center, Hoff Theatre, and the Black Student Union.

Black History Month Events Were Nonexistent at Work

The BHM events included brown bag lunches, guest lecturers, book discussions, art exhibits, movie screenings, and concerts.

After college, only one of my workplaces sponsored or co-hosted BHM programming, or mentioned the observance while I was an employee. In fact, when it came to cultural observances at work, it was primarily an individual decision for respect, acknowledgment and participation.

Some people took time off from work, while others made subtle changes to their attire, appearance, or desk and office. Although I would've considered attending BHM events at work, they were nonexistent. It would have been a different story if my full-time job was at a nonprofit organization, whose mission was in the realm of celebrating Black Americans and their history in the U.S.

Social media platforms were emerging and political correctness was rising just as I left the workplace structure. Besides owning a for-profit business, my work experience has been primarily in the nonprofit sector.

Focusing on each organization's mission statement, I never became accustomed to emphasizing cultural history celebrations at work. The BHM events that I participated as a working adult were usually sponsored by local news outlets, social/fraternal organizations, religious assemblies, and community groups.

The discussion and celebration of Black History can be (and is) a sensitive topic in the U.S. It is especially challenging when some people still interpret (and teach) indisputable historical facts "differently" to the next generation.

Others have opposing views on the impact of slavery (and the pre-Civil War lifestyle accompanying it) in the U.S. Some still disagree with societal advances for equal rights and equal voting access, and feel there's no need to fix the laws rooted in oppressing Black people.

One thing I do like about BHM is the increased (re-)broadcast of movies and documentaries highlighting the contributions and sacrifices that Blacks have made to this country. 

Black History Month Should Be a Learning Opportunity for All

I don't appreciate when people use Black history to market causes or organizations that are proponents of, or are related to, enslaving Black people or keeping them as a permanent underclass.

I am profoundly grateful to the Public Broadcasting Service (PBS) and to the HISTORY brand (formerly History Channel) of A&E Television Networks for their educational history programming, which filled in many gaps, addressing some of my previously unanswered American history questions. They helped to spark new, complex queries for future discussions. It may have been difficult to watch, but I learned.

Black History Month in the U.S. should be a learning opportunity for all races and ethnicities. People should be able to attend BHM events with an open mind and get their intelligent, sincere, respectful questions asked and answered in a safe space.

This is not to say that we should limit the education or discussion to February. I would love to have a similar safe-space opportunity for all cultural observances. The more we learn, the less that divides us.

Note: a version of this blog was first published in February 2022.

The post What Black History Month Means to Me appeared first on Mind Tools.

But what can fathers and same-sex partners do to help new mothers and fathers who are returning to work? And what support should their employers offer?

To Share or Not to Share?

One option in the U.K. is Shared Parental Leave. Different to paternity leave, it allows parents to share up to 50 weeks of leave, and up to 37 weeks of pay between them in the first year after their child is born. This is available to same-sex couples, too.

Mind Tools’ B2C director Mel Dowding and her partner took advantage of Shared Parental Leave, but found that the initiative still needs some fine-tuning.

Mel said, "In a way, we did this on principle because we feel strongly about the opportunity for both parents to have time with their baby, but it was so complicated to set up. And, the same result would have been achieved by my husband taking unpaid leave. It's definitely something that needs reviewing to make it more accessible and meaningful (unsurprisingly there is a low takeup)."

Senior Content Editor Lucy Bishop took maternity leave because her husband was the highest earner in her family. She explained, “My husband would have actually loved to have taken Shared Parental Leave, but, for us, it just didn’t make financial sense, unfortunately. This meant he could only take the basic paternity leave available, which was two weeks at the time we had our first child.

“Luckily, his company increased paternity leave to four weeks (though statutory leave is still two weeks) by the time we had our second child, which, honestly, I still don’t think is enough.

“As any new mum who’s just given birth will tell you, those first few weeks are so tricky to navigate, not just because you are looking after a new baby, but because you’re also physically and emotionally recovering from giving birth yourself.

“I have to admit, even when those four weeks were up, and my husband had to go back to work, there was this impending sense of, 'OK, what do I do now? Now it’s just me and the baby? How am I going to do this all by myself?' The good news is you do (eventually) figure it out.”

Paternity Leave: What the Dads Say

So now we’ve heard from the mums, what do dads think about paternity leave? Is it really enough? I spoke to two fathers at Mind Tools to investigate further.

Nick Payne, Head of Marketing, recalled, "The first three weeks, as first-time parents, were chaos. It felt like you were stuck in a washing machine trying to work out which way was up! You're dealing with a completely life-changing event, learning completely new skills, all on zero hours' sleep.

“Having those three weeks off gave us the opportunity to try and establish a base way of doing things, learn new skills, and, more importantly, enjoy bonding as a family without the pressures of work. I don't understand how people manage without those initial few weeks!"

Head of Research, Gent Ahmetaj, pointed out that "early childhood development is critical, so having both parents there makes a huge difference."

He also said that those first weeks are "…a chance to help your spouse as much as you possibly can. They have been doing the heavy lifting so far – give them a break!"

Two Weeks' Paternity Leave Is Not Enough!

Clearly, paternity leave is key to ensuring a smooth start for new parents (or as smooth as possible given that there’s now a new baby in the house).

Both Nick and Gent took three weeks of paternity leave under Emerald's current leave policy. Gent explained, "Initially I thought I could only take two weeks, but our People team highlighted that the company provides three – I was super happy to hear that! I didn't extend it, but, looking back, I wish I took a further week or so to help my wife.”

Both Nick and Gent said that paternity leave should be longer. "I think a month would be fantastic," Nick told me. Gent was a little more ambitious: "If there is a chance to increase paternity leave from three weeks to something more like three months, that would just change everything!"

Paternity Leave Is Falling

Despite most agreeing that paternity leave is crucial bonding time, the number of eligible fathers who took it fell to less than a third in 2021. However, steady numbers in previous years suggest this may have been down to the pandemic.

Nick agrees with this assumption. He said, "The main benefit of paternity leave is to be at home and be able to help at a very stressful and busy time. If someone is already at home working, new parents may feel that they don't need paternity leave. However, I would strongly argue against this, as it's also a time to be bonding as a family."

Gent also pointed out that "the pandemic brought on an economic crisis, so men might have thought they are at risk of redundancy if they took paternity leave."

Similarly, Nick identified an inequality in pay. He said, "Shared paternity/maternity leave is something that is becoming more common and popular, allowing fathers to take additional paternity leave to allow the mother to return to work earlier, but this is often not paid the same as maternity leave, so ensuring these are treated equally would be fantastic to see."

John Taylor, of EMW Law, puts the poor take-up of paternity leave down to "the extremely low level of pay available under the scheme." And, Professor of Sociology at Oxford Brookes University, Tina Miller, found that "society isn't built for men to lead in care" because many fathers "can't afford to not work while [they're] having [their] first child."

The Stigma of Paternity Leave

Tina Miller's interviewee points out that, in most cases, men are still the breadwinners, so when one parent needs to return to work, it will most likely be the father. However, this often perpetuates the image of women as the "natural caregivers." And, assuming they don't get regular childcare from family, it also means that mothers must take a longer period of time away from work to raise their child. As a result, we see fewer men as primary caregivers than we do women, and so the cycle continues.

Nick also highlighted that there is still a stigma around men taking paternity leave, "especially amongst older generations.” He said, "It's seen as normal 'time off' and there's a misconception that you're not really doing anything to help anyway. But this view feels extremely outdated now, as parents share responsibilities much more than previously."

Nick's beliefs are loudly echoed by a recent CIPD report. Out of 631 working fathers, 73 percent felt that "there's a stigma attached to taking extended paternity leave." Almost all respondents felt that "workplace culture needs to be transformed to normalize men taking extended paternity leave."

What's the Solution?

It's likely that if paternity and/or shared parental leave offered better pay, more men would be inclined to take it. They wouldn't feel financial pressure to return to work so quickly after the birth of their baby, and this would make it easier for their partners to return to work sooner as well (if they wished to). Naturally, this would help them to feel more confident during the transition.

Some companies already offer equal parental leave. Natwest, for example, announced that, from 2023, all parents – irrespective of gender – will be able to take a whole year off to raise their child. Half of this time would be fully paid.

So, while there is still a way to go to perfect paternity leave, clearly it is possible.

Are you a working father who took paternity leave? What changes to your company's policy would you like to see? Let us know in the comments below!

© Original artwork from Anna Montgomery.

The post Why Is Taking Paternity Leave So Hard? appeared first on Mind Tools.