My attacker – my sister – was two. We were on the rug in our living room, playing with wooden bricks. And something about my work on the castle we were building together must not have been to her liking. Because she suddenly picked up the biggest brick she could see and whacked me with it.

There was a little blood, lots of tears, and my sister was hauled away to a safe distance. And, thankfully, she never did it again. Instead, like most people, she steadily improved her ability to share, negotiate, resolve problems, and get her feelings across without resorting to violence.

There were blips along the way (and I'm sure I was no angel). But she learned to be creative with others in a much calmer and more collaborative way. Which was good for my health and safety and, as I’ve come to realize, an essential part of growing up.

Sadly, not everyone at work is quite there yet.

Workplaces at War

In her new book, "Sandbox Strategies for the New Workplace," Penny Tremblay imagines work as a place where we should be able to be creative with a wide range of people, explore what's possible, combine our talents, and have fun while we’re at it. Just like children playing in the sand (or on a living-room rug).

However, we're worse at it than ever, even with many of us now working remotely. In fact, research shows we’re experiencing more conflict than before the pandemic, not less.

So, whether it comes from a sense of unfairness about flexible work hours, personality clashes in virtual meetings, feelings of disconnection – and even exclusion – within a hybrid team, or any number of other potential triggers, Tremblay says that we need to be better at handling conflict than ever before.

And her solution is to look back to childhood – to see the skills that worked well in the sandbox.

Sandbox Strategies for Conflict

These aren't skills for avoiding conflict altogether. After all, great collaboration involves working through conflicting situations and embracing different viewpoints. As well as sometimes confronting unappealing topics to find healthy, creative solutions.

My sister and I would likely have built a better castle if we'd explored our different ideas and pooled our talents. Confrontation doesn't have to mean beating others over the head, figuratively or literally.

Instead, Tremblay's "sandbox strategies" are ways to benefit from the energy created by the “right kind of conflict.” They also bid to protect everyone involved. She paints a glossy picture of children at play, engrossed in a shared activity, experimenting, negotiating, working through any problems as they emerge. All the while constantly improving their coworking skills. And she outlines eight steps to success in her idealized sandbox – brought together in the acronym, "PLAY NICE."

Play Nice!

P, for example, is "position yourself for success." You have to be in the right mental and emotional state to cope with conflict. And preparing for new challenges often means dealing with unresolved conflicts first, or you might bring lots of negative ideas along with you.

As a parent, and especially during a decade working in schools, I often saw children struggling with situations before they'd even started. They'd be worrying about a play date or stressed about a group activity, because of negative experiences in the past.

L is for "lighten your load." Deal with the emotions that are creating conflict for you, or are stopping you from engaging with conflict bravely and positively.

The A in PLAY NICE is "actively listen." How often do kids – and adults – fall out because they don't or won't listen properly to what other people think or need?

And so, step by step, the PLAY NICE approach supports enjoyable, effective coworking, where conflict can be confronted, not dodged. And it leads to what the author calls "assertive play." Not brick-on-skull assertive, or even domineering or aggressive. But self-confident engagement, where people know they have things to contribute, and stake their claim to be fully involved.

The N is particularly important for that: "nurture relationships." However old we are, it's hard to suddenly start being collaborative and creative. You need to build trusting bonds over time. Looking back, I could have done more to make my little sister feel included in our castle-building game.

Conflict: Who's Being Left Out?

So I was particularly drawn to Tremblay's theme of inclusion. Again, parenting and teaching have both taught me that conflict often arises when people feel left out.

So, as we get to grips with virtual and hybrid working, we need to see when people aren’t being involved. Where they're being are left out of decision making, or are excluded from social events. Think of the child left to look on as others play a game, or not invited to that big party.

At work, conflicts that stem from inclusion – creating negative feelings and maybe even challenging behavior – can seriously damage the performance of individuals and teams.

In contrast, getting everyone to "play nice" gives you access to a range of experiences. It also promotes a rich diversity of ideas, and keeps everyone involved in tackling conflicts together. Then moving on.

Time to Grow Up?

The sandbox analogy only goes so far, of course. Different rules apply to children and adults – along with different consequences when things go wrong. Usually, when a child's playtime is over, someone else cleans up the mess.

What's more, as the book makes clear, serious conflict – like harassment or bullying – is anything but a childish matter, and needs to be dealt with way beyond the realm of "play."

However, it feels like we can learn much about dealing with conflicts now by considering the things we learned as kids. Like how to go into challenges with curiosity; include everyone in our games; compromise when necessary. And how we can achieve great things through creative differences and keep on developing our conflict skills – even when we got knocked back (by a brick to the head or otherwise).

It may feel like a stretch to compare adult workplaces with childhood sandboxes. And, I'll be honest, at times Tremblay's analogy comes close to falling apart.

But maybe that's the point. Because, now more than ever, we all need to practice balancing difficult ideas, making sense of differences, combining several viewpoints: "digging in" to conflict, and building great things together.

A few years have gone by, but maybe I'll give my sister a call and see if we can have another go at that castle.

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About the Author

Jonathan Hancock is a Senior Editor/Writer at Mind Tools. In his own right he's published 13 books about learning, written a memory column for Reader's Digest magazine, and acted as a consultant to a number of TV shows including "Child Genius."

Before joining Mind Tools, Jonathan spent a decade in education, as a teacher and eventually a headteacher. He's also an experienced broadcaster and event host, following 15 years working as a presenter and producer for the BBC.

The post Digging Into Conflict: How to "Play Nice" at Work appeared first on Mind Tools.

Guess what? This time the power button broke as soon as it hit the floor. It flashed on and off on sleep mode, and I couldn't power it either on or off. Here I was in Copenhagen, Denmark, spending some of the time I'd planned to sightsee… taking my computer in to the shop.

Categorizing Regrets

In his book "The Power of Regret," Daniel H. Pink writes about the upside of one of our less pleasant emotions, regret. Regrets are common and painful, but they can also be surprisingly motivating.

Pink conducted research on regret and determined from his very sizeable surveys that regrets can be categorized depending on their focus, rather than on their content.

For example, one person might regret not going to university while another regrets not proposing to a girlfriend – but both are essentially regretting a lack of boldness.

Many regrets focus on actions not taken, though some focus on deeds done. In each case, we can take inspiration from our regrets to live, in the future, in ways that more fully reflect our desires.

At Least…

In the case of actions taken, Pink says that we can make efforts to undo their damage if possible. My poor laptop is now sitting in a shop in the U.K., waiting for diagnosis and repair. Whether it gets up and running again, or whether I end up needing to buy a new laptop, I'll be cautious about when I use it and where I put it!

We can also make ourselves better with "at least" statements – acknowledging to ourselves that the outcome could have been worse. At least I had my work laptop with me. At least I hadn't broken it on my previous trip, where it was my one and only computer. And at least I had saved most of my important documents to the cloud so was able to access them there.

I'm a little clumsy. I probably always will be. But I can strive to be more mindful in the future to take care of my technology, rather than thoughtlessly hauling it around.

To Regret Is Human

In the 1980s cartoon "The Last Unicorn" (based on Peter S. Beagle's novel), a unicorn is transformed into a human, falls in love, and is eventually returned to her original form. She gains an appreciation of human emotions, including the bittersweet ones.

In the end, she says to the magician responsible for the transformation, "No unicorn was ever born who could regret, but I do. I regret." Then, rather than getting angry at the magician, she thanks him.

Pink writes that regret makes us human. And with its power to impact our future choices, it makes us better.

Listen to Our "Power of Regret" Book Insight

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About the Author

Melanie has worked as a writer, freelance and in-house editor, university writing instructor, and language teacher. She is the author of a short story collection, "Dream Signs," and a nonfiction book, "The Modern Enneagram." Melanie has written for several publications including Huffington Post, Cicada, and Contrary Magazine. And she is a certified teacher of the Enneagram, a personality typology that illuminates people's core motivations.

The post I Might Regret Writing This Blog  appeared first on Mind Tools.

My habits? Mostly bad, apparently. I procrastinate, mutter under my breath, and overthink decisions. Any decisions. I have this all on excellent authority. She's been taking notes for three decades.

The thing is, I don't think about my habits much, unless they're spotlighted. When I do, I just consider them part of being me, essential components of my identity. However irritating they might be to others.

But what if I could change the bad habits, even the ones that seem ingrained and permanent? What if I could replace them with better ones, maybe even making myself a better person?

It's an enticing prospect. And James Clear shows how you can do it, in his book "Atomic Habits: An Easy and Proven Way to Build Good Habits and Break Bad Ones."

The Structure of Atoms

The book's title plays on two senses of the word atomic. One, atoms are really tiny. So are the initial changes you can make to your habits. Two, when atoms all do the same thing at the same time, you get atomic power. And the incremental effect of lots of tiny changes to your habits can be – or feel – equally huge.

For Clear, all habits share a clearly defined structure. It's in four parts: cue, craving, response, and reward. The cue triggers a craving, which motivates a response, which provides a reward, which satisfies the craving. Over time, the reward becomes associated with the cue.

So the cue might be the smell of coffee, or just entering the kitchen at the same time every morning. You feel you really need a coffee. That's the craving.

So you make one. That's the response. You get your coffee. And that's your reward. And because you enjoy it, you'll probably go through the whole process again tomorrow morning.

Breaking Bad Habits With the Four Laws

The book develops the four-part structure into four laws for habit change. If you want to develop a good habit, make the cue obvious. Then, make the new habit attractive, to develop a craving. Third, make the response something you can do easily. Finally, make your new habit satisfying, so that you'll repeat it.

Want to break a bad habit? Hide the cue. Make the habit unattractive to you. Make the response difficult, and the outcome unsatisfying. Easier said than done, you might think. But "Atomic Habits" talks you through how you can do it.

The Sky's the Limit?

And the results? Let's consider habits you can measure easily. If you look at making a one percent improvement in what you're doing daily, then after a year, you'll be 37 times better at it. That's the math. Of course, 37 times improvement on a bad starting point can still represent modest results.

There has to be a ceiling, too. I'm not going to get that Olympic track cycling gold, ever. But I might be able to spend enough time on the exercise bike to do myself some real good, and not end up a wheezing wreck.

Forget About Goals

The book makes some bold claims in other directions, too. Setting goals is a waste of time, for example. At least, it is if you don't have the processes in place to achieve them. And even reaching a goal can be unsatisfying, because you feel you have to set another one.

True happiness, the book argues, comes from having robust systems for personal improvement, not reaching milestones. Whether you agree with that or not, it's food for thought.

All Change for a Better You

And the ultimate goal of these systems? Identity change. That's right. It's that fundamental. Changing your habits can actually make you a different, better version of yourself. That's quite a challenging thought. But the book's nothing if not a practical manual, and Clear's tone throughout is brisk and can-do.

I went on the exercise bike yesterday, for the first time in a while. I repeated the effort today and went a tiny bit further. No, I won't be entering the Tour de France anytime soon, and I don't know whether I'll become a different person. But I do feel I've got a plan to feel a bit fitter. And that's got to be progress.

Listen to Our "Atomic Habits" Book Insight

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About the Author:

Content Editor/Writer Simon Bell knows how to explain things as simply as possible. He spent 20 years in educational publishing, before working on the popular "For Dummies" books. At Mind Tools, he's particularly proud of the Skillbook he wrote about managing stress, and his article on Porter's Five Forces – one of our most popular resources. He also helps to produce the influential reports created by our in-house Impact and Insights team. Simon enjoys learning about history, and sharing new music with his sons. And his favorite advice is about balancing work and life: "Know when you've done enough at work – then go home!"

The post How to Make Good on Bad Habits appeared first on Mind Tools.

In one place I worked, there was a guy called Nick. Nick is his real name. I doubt anyone will recognize him from my description now, and why should I spare his blushes? Anyway, Nick was a knowledgeable guy. As the product of an expensive education, he should have been. And he knew it.

None of which would be a problem, except that Nick didn't wear his knowledge lightly. In meetings, he'd correct people, interrupt for "clarification," and dispute petty points. He'd also just talk over people, including me. And my reaction was not me at my best. I neither confronted him, nor rose above him. I just sat there in a passive-aggressive huff.

Recognizing Triggers

I'd been triggered. Triggers are actions that provoke a negative emotional response. That response might be anger, resignation or fear, to name but three. We're perhaps used to hearing about triggers in connection with racist or sexist microaggression. But triggers are everywhere, and they're often delivered unintentionally. They can still do huge harm.

Sally Helgesen's book "Rising Together" is largely devoted to a study of triggers, and how to overcome them – so that everyone in an organization can be heard, can be valued, and can thrive. And some of her observations are surprising.

Reframing Your Thinking

Can you be too authentic, for example? Surely not. Projecting authenticity is a vital skill in building trust, particularly for managers. But what if your determination to be true to yourself damages your relationships with others, and marks you out as inflexible? Maybe that's too authentic.

That's not to say that we should just sit back and accept overt bad behavior. But it's worth thinking about what else you can do when you're triggered, other than sit there with steam coming out of your ears.

Maybe you could reframe what you're experiencing. In my case, perhaps Nick was actually a decent guy whose anxiety to make a good impression made him overkeen, for example. I could have met him halfway, perhaps supporting some of his points while quietly making a few of my own.

Insincere? Perhaps, a little. But also, it would have been more effective in establishing my own right to speak. And that's good old assertiveness. I'm already feeling calmer and more in control, albeit 20 years too late.

Confidence Isn't Everything

If that's a fresh take on authenticity, then wait until you hear what Helgesen has to say about confidence. Recruiters love confidence. They want executives who can deliver a vision and carry a room. Never mind whether they actually understand the market they're in.

But news just in: in winning people over, confidence is actually far less important than boring old competence. Take the new Ford CEO who freely admitted that he didn't know much about the car industry. You can imagine a room full of car industry execs inhaling sharply together. How could he get away with saying such a thing?

Well, by pointing out that everyone else in the room had that knowledge, and that he was prepared to work as hard as required to acquire it. Which he did.

Admitting his lack of knowledge became a strength, not a weakness.

Triggers Build Barriers, We Need to Pull Them Down

The main point of "Rising Together" is about inclusivity. Most of us want to belong to organizations that encourage a culture of belonging. We want everyone to be valued and heard. And we want to be able to communicate freely.

Triggers help to build barriers between people. To overcome them, we need to admit our own failings and be a little more understanding of the failings of others. It can be a tough ask. It can require us to examine quite a lot of what we thought we knew. But the rewards, as Helgesen lays them out, are worth the effort many times over.

Listen to Our "Rising Together" Book Insight

We review the best new business books and the tested classics in our monthly Book Insights, available as text or as 15-minute audio recordings.

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About the Author:

Simon has been researching, writing and editing non-fiction for over 30 years. In that time he's worked on educational courses, scientific journals, and mass-market trade books about everything from popular psychology to buying houses in Bulgaria. In the last 20 years he's specialized in simplifying complex subjects, and helping readers to learn new skills. Away from work he listens to good music, watches bad football, and is fascinated by medieval history.

The post Triggers: How to Stop Rising to the Bait appeared first on Mind Tools.

But emotions have their place at work, much as many of us like to pretend that our jobs are all business. Liz Fosslien and Mollie West Duffy have written two excellent books on the topic. "No Hard Feelings" describes the need and value of bringing your emotions to work in a balanced way, while "Big Feelings" discusses how to deal with the difficult feelings we all face at times.

Sometimes we're dealing with big feelings in our personal lives. We might need support. And acknowledging and addressing our emotional needs can help us to get our work done.

Feelings Too Big to Hide at Work

Last year, I struggled with my big feelings around major life transitions. I hadn't mentioned these personal events to any colleagues. Then I attended a team-building event where the whole company got together.

It started with an ice-breaker exercise and I found myself face-to-face with the head of the whole company. We had a question to discuss that looked innocent on the surface, but it also got a bit personal. As I started answering the question, I began to cry, right in front of him.

He didn't know the context for my breakdown, as it wasn't really contained in the question or my answer. But I'm grateful for his kind and even-handed response. It was a wake-up call for me that I needed support during this tough time. My feelings were too big to keep to myself – and too overwhelming to successfully fence off from my working life.

Finding Support

Ultimately, work is what helped me navigate these big feelings. I spoke to supportive colleagues about my life changes. I also attended a program called "Tea and Talk," offered by my company's Mental Health First Aid initiative. One colleague led these monthly sessions, facilitating laid-back discussions around a mental health topic while we all chatted over coffee or tea.

Sometimes we need to take time off to navigate big feelings. For me, it was the opposite – I found that my work provided a necessary distraction from getting too overwhelmed by emotions.

Having something useful to do helped me feel productive during a difficult time. And when I needed to take small breaks during the day to process emotions by doing things like taking a walk or grabbing a cup of tea, my flexible working schedule allowed me to take them.

Feeling and Connecting

Bringing my feelings to work, like I'm doing right now in this blog, helps me connect with others, whether it's through the content I write or my relationships with colleagues. I've realized that knowing how to handle my emotions in a healthy way makes me better at my job.

So, don't leave your big feelings behind when you start your workday. They won't stay there. Learn how to bring them gracefully into your professional life, and they'll enrich the work you do!

Listen to Our "Big Feelings and No Hard Feelings" Book Insight

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If you haven't already signed up, join the Mind Tools Club and gain access to our 2,400+ resources, including 390+ Book Insights. For corporate licensing, ask for a demo with one of our team.

About the Author

Melanie has worked as a writer, freelance and in-house editor, university writing instructor, and language teacher. She is the author of a short story collection, "Dream Signs," and a non-fiction book, "The Modern Enneagram." Melanie has written for several publications including Huffington Post, Cicada, and Contrary Magazine. And she is a certified teacher of the Enneagram, a personality typology that illuminates people's core motivations.

The post When Big Feelings Come to Work  appeared first on Mind Tools.

That's it, what to say about... Oh wait up, what's this? An email alert from the boss. Can't ignore that. And my phone just pinged me. And before you know it, an hour's gone by and this blog is going nowhere.

It's a problem we've likely all faced. It's difficult to give your attention to just one thing over the course of a working day. When did you last manage it? So many other nudges, notifications and essential updates jostle for your attention.

And that's just the work stuff. Add all the funny noises my phone makes, and a bad day can be a constant battle to concentrate on anything.

A Crisis of Focus

This is a relatively recent phenomenon. But it's getting worse. How much worse? Well, as Johann Hari is keen to explain in his book "Stolen Focus: Why You Can't Pay Attention," the forces determined to attract and keep our attention are everywhere, and they're enormously powerful.

And we aren't doing enough to help ourselves. Sound like something from the "Matrix" movie franchise? It's not. "Stolen Focus" isn't a bunch of conspiracy theories. It’s based on many interviews with leading experts in everything from Big Tech to sleep deprivation.

And the picture they paint is a disturbing one.

The Battle for Attention

First, they really are out to get us. There are whole industries dedicated to grabbing our attention. They offer what we think of as rewards – bonus points, membership privileges, that sort of thing – and in return we give them our data.

Then they use that data to build complex profiles of us so that they can put adverts before us for things they know we want.

If that sounds sinister, consider what else behavioral scientists and data analysts can use that data for. They can predict not just what we might want to buy, but what we think about bigger issues. Even how we might vote. If they can predict something, they will likely try to influence it.

Sure, we can switch off our devices. We can lock them away. If we're lucky, we can escape to remote locations – as Hari does. But we're still susceptible. We're still experiencing something close to addiction.

How We Steal Our Own Focus

Second, we harm our own attention from the moment we get up. All too often we grab high-fat, high-sugar snacks rather than proper food. We expose ourselves to brain-damaging pollution daily.

When we do finally put aside the screens to go to bed, we can't sleep properly. So our brains are exhausted, and our ability to focus takes another knock.

Many of us also live in cultures that value the quick fix. So doctors prescribe vast quantities of drugs to treat ADHD, depression and sleeplessness, while leaving the root causes untouched.

In some cases, these causes are to do with innate psychological problems and brain chemistry. But for many people, maybe most, it's the environment in which they live that's the problem.

The Will to Change – and Why We Often Can't

There's another insidious factor at work, and again it's cultural. Hari calls it "cruel optimism." We all want to believe that we can change. That belief should be empowering.

But it's double-edged. If we fail to give up junk food, Twitter, or playing video games until 3 a.m., it's on us. Our willpower's the problem. Never mind that billions of dollars are spent every year trying to overcome that willpower.

Reclaiming Our Attention

It's a grim picture. So are there any positives? Well, we can take steps to change the way we behave as individuals, cruel optimism or not. Hari outlines them. And we can learn lessons from some societies that have taken steps to address this constant erosion of attention.

But Hari's main targets throughout are larger scale. They're industrial complexes and dysfunctional societies. And they will only change how they behave through collective action. Whether it's because customers or activists demand it, or governments enforce it, it'll still be a long-term battle.

"Stolen Focus" is a wake-up call. It deserves our attention – if we can spare it. Because the consequences of whole societies being in a state of distraction are dire. They certainly go beyond whether this blog gets finished or not.

So I'll definitely be turning off the laptop earlier, and spending more time with a good book. As soon as I've checked Twitter, obviously.

Listen to Our "Stolen Focus" Book Insight

We review the best new business books and the tested classics in our monthly Book Insights, available as text or as 15-minute audio recordings.

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About the Author

Simon has been researching, writing and editing non-fiction for over 30 years. In that time he's worked on educational courses, scientific journals, and mass-market trade books about everything from popular psychology to buying houses in Bulgaria. In the last 20 years he's specialized in simplifying complex subjects, and helping readers to learn new skills. Away from work he listens to good music, watches bad football, and is fascinated by medieval history.

The post Time to Focus on Our Dangerous Lack of Focus appeared first on Mind Tools.

I was recently out for a social occasion with some former teammates from my days in publishing. We were colleagues for nearly a decade. We've been through a lot together, and we're pretty close. Inevitably, we reminisced.

After a few laughs, someone said, "Oh, and what about Michael?" The mood changed instantly. Eyes were rolled. Heads were shaken. Words were used which had no place in a friendly gathering. The contempt and loathing were unanimous.

When Middle Managers Go Bad

Michael – not his real name, for obvious reasons – had been our manager. What you'd call a "middle manager." Neither C-suiter nor grunt, he was responsible for presenting the numbers to the next managerial layer up. And responsible for us.

Seen from above, I've no doubt that Michael was a model of competence. He hit targets and trimmed costs. He smoothed any potential turbulence, shielding his own superiors from the serious organizational problems being faced by team members.

From below, he was a nightmare. Untrustworthy, evasive and weak, he would go weeks without speaking to any of us outside formal meetings. As a close-knit group working on outlier projects, we probably weren't the easiest bunch to manage. But Michael didn't try.

The Stretched Middle

Michael's brand of "managing up" is just one reason why middle managers get a bad rap. And yet it's easy to see why it happens. Middle managers are often forced to flip between directing their teams and deferring to their superiors. They end up working on behalf of their reports and appeasing bosses who aren't interested in their problems, as long as the numbers look good.

It's no wonder some of them take the easy option. Others try to face both ways at the same time, fall short, and suffer stress or even burnout.

This is the situation the book "Power to the Middle" addresses. Written by three McKinsey consultants with substantial experience of middle management, the book acknowledges that middle managers are in the midst of a crisis. But it doesn't have to be that way.

A Better Way for Middle Managers?

Back to the social gathering. Also present was the manager who had set up the team in the first place. Let's call her Kate. Before being made redundant – a frequent fate for middle managers – Kate had recruited us, built our skills and invested time in us.

She had also shielded us from the politics and maneuvering of the layer above her. And she was with us that evening as a friend, not a former manager.

The authors of "Power to the Middle" would approve of Kate. She's their kind of middle manager. But she could only truly have flourished in an enlightened organization. Enlightened enough to see her potential as a developer of people. To free her from micro-reporting and infighting. Our employer wasn't that organization. Kate went, and we got Michael.

Freedom From Above

Typically, Kate is diplomatic about Michael. She understands the pressures that make him what he is. But she's also certain that her way of doing things is the right way. Her reports would agree. Her own bosses might have seen the point too, if they could've looked away from a culture based on the short-term fix. It's a big ask. But doesn't a culture in which people are free to develop their own skills and their teams' sound like a healthier option?

The authors of "Power to the Middle" think so. They place revitalized middle managers at the very heart of healthy organization, empowered by an enlightened C-suite. And isn't that where they ought to be?

Listen to Our "Power to the Middle" Book Insight

We review the best new business books and the tested classics in our monthly Book Insights, available as text or as 15-minute audio downloads.

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About the Author

Simon has been researching, writing and editing non-fiction for over 30 years. In that time he’s worked on educational courses, scientific journals, and mass-market trade books about everything from popular psychology to buying houses in Bulgaria. In the last 20 years he’s specialized in simplifying complex subjects, and helping readers to learn new skills. Away from work he listens to good music, watches bad football, and is fascinated by medieval history.

The post Why Middle Managers Need Better Managing appeared first on Mind Tools.

Ever since I fell for an official-looking phishing email, I’ve learned to be wary. Those threatening calls from insurance companies or the IRS? They don't usually come from the entities they claim to be. Especially if there’s plenty of noise from a call center in the background!

I've also avoided becoming an "accidental perpetrator" of fraud. I once ordered a package of heavy-duty cleaning wipes from Amazon. When they didn't show up after the website claimed they were delivered, I asked the company to resend them. The next day, the cleaning wipes appeared on my doorstep. Yet a new supply was in transit.

I could easily have kept two sets of cleaning wipes for the price of one. But I followed the procedure and reported to Amazon that I'd now received the original package. They then recalled the other one.

The Whys Behind Fraud 

In her book "Fool Me Once," forensic accounting professor Kelly Richmond Pope delves into the psychology of fraud. She looks at the reasons people commit, fall for and report it.

She sets out to raise readers' awareness of potential frauds they may encounter and encourages them to speak up when they see something suspicious. 

Who commits fraud, and why? Who falls for it, and why? In the case of the phishing email I mentioned, I fell for a false sense of urgency and the belief that some software needed to be updated. Sure, that is the sort of thing that does happen, but it's best to check the email address before clicking on a link. 

A Near Miss With Crossing the Line

And what about my own narrowly averted commission of fraud? My episode with the cleaning wipes may sound low stakes. After all, would any harm have been done if I'd kept a second set without reporting that the first had arrived? I would have simply been benefiting from someone else's mistake.

But it's easy to shift blame in such an instance. What if, instead of cleaning wipes, my employer had accidentally overpaid my salary? You can see how simple it is to cross the line from innocence into what is, in fact, crime.

If it's that easy to commit fraud, no wonder it's so widespread.

Fraud and Fraudsters

"Fool Me Once" covers the whole fraud spectrum, from simple examples like mine to grandiose cases like that of comptroller Rita Crundwell. She had sole oversight of the finances of Dixon, Illinois – and stole $53 million over the years, which she spent on 400 horses and other luxuries.

The book offers a wealth of juicy and enlightening information about fraud, the people behind it and why they did it. And it turns the tables on many people's views of whistleblowers.

Often, they face negativity for being "snitches," but I can see Pope’s point that it takes moral courage to speak up. 

The book encourages us all to cultivate this type of moral courage, along with commonsense vigilance – such as keeping an eye on any financial transactions we have a say over. We can't always avoid fraud. But we can practice keeping our eyes open. 

And if we happen to receive an extra batch of cleaning wipes, the least we can do is send them back!

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About the Author:

Melanie has worked as a writer, freelance and in-house editor, university writing instructor, and language teacher. She is the author of a short story collection, "Dream Signs," and a non-fiction book, "The Modern Enneagram." She has written for several publications including Huffington Post, Cicada, and Contrary Magazine. She is a certified teacher of the Enneagram, a personality typology that illuminates people's core motivations.

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I was surprised to learn that a Victorian soap-making company built Port Sunlight for its workers. "Sunlight" was the name of their leading soap brand. The name of the company was Lever Brothers.

I say I was surprised because this was at odds with what I thought I knew about industrial life in Victorian England. I'd read Dickens' novels – even the really long ones. I knew about the boot-blacking factories, the grim northern mills, and the struggles of the urban poor.

The Correct Use of Soap

So what were the people who conceived Port Sunlight thinking? OK, it was built toward the end of the Victorian era. Fewer children were working in hard manual labor, and most were learning to read and write. But even so, Port Sunlight was radical. Was it just an example of paternalism? Was the bosses' mission just to look after the little people out of a sense of self-regarding righteousness?

Turns out it was simpler than that. A happy, healthy, well-housed workforce performed better. Port Sunlight was good for business. Lever Brothers started out by making a product that promoted cleanliness and good health, at a time when public health was going through a revolution. And they built that promotion into their own business.

Mission Control Is Working With a Purpose

Fast forward 100 years or so, to 2009. Lever Brothers have come a long way. Under the name Unilever, the company has grown into a huge, diversified group with interests in foods, chemicals, and a wide range of domestic products. And it's got problems.

That's where one of the co-authors of "Net Positive: How Courageous Companies Thrive by Giving More Than They Take" comes in. He's Paul Polman, former CEO of Unilever. When he took over the company, it was in the doldrums. Growth was flat, shareholders were restless. The company was a case study in tired, industry-standard practice. Short-term profits were prioritized over investment and development.

Polman understood that Unilever needed to rediscover its purpose – a word that's everywhere in "Net Positive." Because companies that have a wider mission than simply delivering profits for shareholders will likely end up ahead of the market. And along the way they can do real good in the world.

Lever Brothers had begun its journey toward becoming a global commercial juggernaut by looking after its people. Those people, in turn, had gone to work to make a major contribution to Britain's late-19th-century public health revolution.

So, a century or so later, Polman brought the senior managers of the company together to rediscover their corporate purpose at the place where it all began: Port Sunlight.

Mission Brings Meaning to Work

"Net Positive" charts Unilever's drive to become one of the world's most environmentally and socially aware corporations. A business that seeks not only to be neutral in impact, but to actively make the world better.

If you think of the enormous demands that manufacturing corporations make on natural resources, to name but one area, it's a tough ask. And Unilever has a negative history to address. Sunlight Soap, which set the whole ball rolling, way back when, was made using palm oil – a resource whose production is now identified as one of the most damaging to biodiversity.

But the effort seems to be sincere. It's rooted in a revolution in corporate culture. Employees are challenged to find their personal purpose and their personal mission, and they're held accountable for what they do. The "Unilever Sustainable Living Plan" brings sustainability to the fore and sets tough benchmarks. And Unilever has rediscovered what its founders learned back in the day: treating people decently is good for business.

A Sustainable Way Forward?

You could be very cynical about "Net Positive," and Unilever. Global corporations must, at some point, turn in healthy profits. They aren't charities. Corporations often pride themselves on their toughness, in a macho way. And "greenwashing" has become widespread. I remember the collapse of Enron, and the global banking crisis of 2009. I reserve the right to be skeptical.

But I also remember Port Sunlight. And I remember that I've lived in far worse housing, and that many people still do. Unilever is on the record as a company that recognizes its history, and understands its future responsibilities. And if it leads the way for others to follow, then maybe we do have the basis for a revolution in corporate thinking.

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Do businesses have a responsibility to deliver more than just profits for shareholders? Should they put sustainability on an equal footing? Let us know in the Comments, below.

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I'd seen the Northern Lights that year over my house and was captivated by them. They don't appear often in my childhood home of Prince Edward Island, Canada. Their traces were faint, bands of green and white flickering among the stars. I felt connected with the wonder of the universe we live in.

Invention Inspiration

For my enrichment project, I researched the Northern Lights. I learned about the science behind them as well as the myths connected to them. I made a collage of pictures. Then I found something cool on the internet: instructions for making a simulator that could imitate the Northern Lights.

It involved a bell jar, an ikebana frog (not an amphibian but a type of Japanese flower-arranging equipment!), and the application of an electric current. The result was a glow that looked like the aurora. Of course, I wanted to build a simulator myself.

The Trouble With Invention

I continued with my Northern Lights simulator idea for a science project. I found a high school teacher who was excited to work with me on it. We got the equipment, put it together, and turned the current on. Nope. Nothing!

I came up with theories that I thought might explain why it didn't work. I won a prize at the school science fair with my not-yet-working experiment and went on to the provincial fair, with time in between to test my theories out.

We never did get the simulator to work, but it was a good exercise in troubleshooting. An invention like that just needed more than a couple of theories and more than a couple of tries.

Trying Times

In her book "The Alchemy of Us," materials scientist and writer Ainissa Ramirez introduces us to the stories behind the inventions that shaped our world. I loved reading about how better clocks changed our ways of sleeping, how they changed how we interact with each other. I loved learning how carbon filaments created better lighting but also light pollution, and how computers are changing our brains.

The author wants us to see ourselves reflected in the stories, so she crafted careful portraits of the inventors as people. Readers get to know a little about their interests, hopes and flaws. They also learn just how much effort these people put in.

Several of the inventors tried and tried again for years, experimenting with different materials until their ideas became a physical reality. Some of them collaborated, as I did with my high school science teacher. It often takes a lot of work to create something impactful.

Inventions and Their Unintended Consequences

"The Alchemy of Us" highlights the value of innovating, but also of thinking critically about what we do and what the consequences of an invention might be. Technology comes from the material world, and it impacts that world in far-reaching and unforeseen ways.

You read about all those inventions and think about how brilliant the world is, the complicated ways in which it works. And all the ways that our inventions shape it. You read about the inventors and think, "Maybe I can be brilliant, too."

The wonder of the world around us is the source of those inventions – the same wonder that inspired me to give a Northern Lights simulator a go.

The book worked. After reading it, I want to learn. I want to take risks. Maybe it's time for another science experiment…

Download our "The Alchemy of Us" Book Insight

We review the best new business books and the tested classics in our monthly Book Insights, available as text or as 15-minute audio downloads.

So, if you're a Mind Tools Club member or corporate user, download or stream the "The Alchemy of Us" Book Insight now!

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What inventions have affected you the most? What would you like someone to invent next? Let us know in the comments, below.

The post Nature Was the Mother of My Invention appeared first on Mind Tools.